February/March 2014

ASK A PRIEST

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

FATHER WILLIAM G. MENZEL
FATHER KEVIN BATES, SM
CATHOLICVIEW STAFF
CATHOLICVIEW PRIEST STAFF

 FATHER KEVIN BATES, SM

"I fell in love with my first cousin.  Can we marry?" - Ariana

Father Kevin:

My first cousin and I fell in love. Is there anyway we could ever get married or be accepted by the Catholic Church? – Ariana

________________________________

Hello Ariana:

First of all you and your cousin will always be accepted by the Catholic Church.  The civil law here in Australia is the same as that of the Catholic Church and first cousins are not allowed to marry each other.  It has something to do with the risk of in-breeding as the children of siblings and close relative have a high chance of being born with significant  genetic abnormalities.

You may wish to consult a local priest who has some expertise in Canon Law to explain it further to you.  I have just consulted the Code of Canon Law and it is clear that such a marriage is not possible in the Catholic Church.  That is probably the case civilly in whichever country you reside.

I wish you well and hope you find some happy resolution of the matter for yourselves.  Every blessing. -  Father Kevin
 

"Can I  attend a major league baseball game if it supports
a homosexual group called "GLADD"?  - Paul

Father Kevin:

My favorite pastime is baseball. In October all major league teams sent out a tweet supporting a radical homosexual group called "GLADD." Is it morally acceptable to pay money to go to games when teams do this, if my intent is not to support an immoral cause but to simply enjoy the game?  Bless you.  Paul

_____________________________

HI Paul:

Go and enjoy the game mate!  Going to the game is not a statement of support or otherwise for this group.  It would be worth looking into the tweet to work out what they mean by “support” for this organization. If it is just to offer support to homosexual people , then as Pope Francis says, “who are we to judge?”  If it was to support homosexual activity expressly, then you could have some doubts about supporting the tweet. 

In the meantime, enjoy the game.

Father Kevin
PS: Major League Baseball is invading us here in Sydney in March as two opening season games are being played by two teams from the US.  We are a stronghold for the international game of cricket so it will be fun to have US  baseball hit town for a few days.

"Where does the Bible show that the rapture is NOT a
pre-tribulation rapture?" - Lynn

Father Kevin:

I've been trying to study the bible & I'm really confused about where exactly in the bible, it shows.  It seems like religions interpret the end time passages differently & it's very confusing to me. Please & thank you for your time. God bless. – Lynn

_____________________________

Dear Lynn:

I’m not clear what you mean by “where exactly it shows.”   It is true that various religions do interpret the Bible to suit their own beliefs.  In our Catholic Tradition, in company with many of our Protestant fellow-believer, we have many fine Scripture scholars around the world who spend their lives studying the Scriptures to tease out and help us understand the real meaning of the texts. Many texts are obscure.  Many texts are poetry, many are history, many are stories made up to make a point.

There will always be debate around the content of the Books of the Bible.  However, there is no debate around the absolute love of God for each one of us and for all people and all creation.  If we look at the Scriptures through the lens of love, they can come alive for us.  Every blessing. - Father Kevin

“Can I give my Church tithe to charity or an orphanage?”
 - Eric

Father Kevin:

Can I give my entire tithe amount to a charity or to an orphanage where they take care of homeless, sick or abandoned  children?  Is it ok if I don't give it in the Church, but to such institutions run with the Church approval locally?     - Eric

___________________________

HI Eric,

It’s perfectly appropriate for you to donate and share your money in any way you see fit.  God happily trusts us to make good choices and He trusts that we will do our best in this regard.  If you judge a greater need as you seem to be doing then God bless you for your generosity. - Father Kevin

“I am concerned about the way the Church is heading
on the divorced, the practicing gays, etc..  Why is the
Church becoming liberal?” - Lorraine

 

Father Kevin:

I'm very concerned about the way the church is heading on the gays and the divorced being allowed to take communion and toning down the teaching of the church. I've always been so proud that the church was not bending to anyone's will except God's.  Why is the church becoming so liberal and trying to blend in with the other religions?  Why are Catholics getting so Wimpy? – Lorraine

____________________________
 

Hi Lorraine,

In last Sunday’s gospel we read about Jesus’ encounter with the woman at the well.  She had had five husbands and was currently living with another man. She had an experience of  “communion” with Jesus if you like, and without ever approaching a Church Tribunal for an annulment, she becomes his missionary, spreading the Good News to the people in her village.  Would we say Jesus is being wimpy here?  According to the sorts of judgements you are making, the answer is yes!!

Gay and Divorced people have always been able to receive Communion in the Catholic Church.  It is only if they have publicly remarried without an annulment, in the case of divorced people, or publicly proclaimed that they were sexually active in the case of gay people, that Communion would be refused them.  The Church’s law in this regard has not changed.

However, Pope Francis has suggested that the Bishops examine the situation of divorced and remarried people at the upcoming Synod of Bishops so we wait to see what happens there.

Equating God’s Will with rigid and exclusive rules reveals an attitude that is out of step with our deep Catholic Tradition.  At the heart of the Gospel and the Church’s mission is the presence of God’s unconditional mercy, which allows for people to make mistakes, be forgiven and return to full communion with the Church. 

Consider the Good Samaritan in Luke’s gospel.  Jesus has him actually breaking all the rules of the day in order to show God’s unconditional mercy and compassion.  The Church is very clear in its teaching that the law is meant to help people grow in their faith.  IT is not designed to condemn and exclude. 

That was the role of the Scribes and the Pharisees in Jesus’ day.  They were the ones Jesus with whom got angry.  He never had a harsh word to say to people who were battling to make sense of their lives or battling to overcome their struggle with sin.  It is apt that we take a leaf out of His book.  -  Father Kevin

“Why is “the washing of feet” not considered a
sacrament?” – Jurgen

Father Kevin:

Could you please give me a good theological reason why "The washing of feet" is not considered as a sacrament?  It was instituted by Jesus, and it has the element of water, and a ritual. Thanks!  - Jurgen

 ______________________________

Jurgen hi,

What a brilliant question.  It is significant that in John’s account of the Last Supper there is no bread and wine story, only foot washing!  Foot Washing is a great means of creating communion between people.  Here we are vulnerable and the gift of touch is a most sacred sacramental moment.  I studied foot massage some years’ ago and use it occasionally here in Australia.  When visiting San Francisco some years’ ago I spent time with an old friend who massages the feet of the homeless around the Tenderloin district.  The sacramentality of her ministry was unmistakable.

So to answer your question, I don’t really know except to say that the sharing of meals is a more universal event than foot-washing, and if you look at all the raw materials of the seven Sacraments of the Church, they use symbols that are common to all humanity and so can more easily be accessed by anyone.  Perhaps foot-washing was seen to be a more specialised service.

Every blessing and I’ll look forward to asking some other colleagues what they make of your excellent question.  -  Father Kevin

FATHER WILLIAM G. MENZEL

How do we know the will of God?  - Julius

Father:

How do we know the will of God?  How is this related to the Free Will He has given us? – Julius

 _____________________________

Dear Julius:

The question you ask is surely an ancient one. Once our ancestors became conscious of a Higher Power, they sought to know his mind, his will, his reasons for why things are the way they are. They also sought to influence or change his will.

I'm quite sure that we can only know the will of God in a general sense. For example, we can know that it is the will of God that all people be saved. We can know that it is the will of God that we love him and that we love one another.

Since I do not believe that God micromanages the universe, I do not think that we can usually know the will of God in particular circumstances. For example, I don't think it is God's will that Joe should choose to marry Nancy rather than Karen. This is Joe's decision. Certainly he could pray about it and seek God's guidance, but it is still his decision. Assuming they are both good and decent persons, Joe will not contradict God's will by choosing one over the other.

Likewise, I do not believe that it is the will of God that a drunk driver should cross the centerline and crash head-on into a car loaded with teenagers driving home from a game. To “blame” God for the drunk driver's tragic decision is like Adam blaming Eve and Eve blaming the serpent. God does not will our human irresponsibility. He allows it, because he will not trample on free will. The blame fall on the drunk driver.

If you asked this question because you want to do the will of God regarding some matter, then I think you have to make your decision within the broad context of your Christian faith. When we love God above all, then we are doing his will. When we love our neighbor as ourselves, then we are doing his will. When we strive to live the Gospel in our daily lives, then we are doing his will. When we follow the Ten Commandments, then we are doing his will. When we pray with sincerity, then we are doing his will. When we say in the Lord's Prayer “thy will be done”, then we are doing his will.

If, on the other hand, you asked your question because you're trying to reconcile God's knowledge and will with human free will, then I would encourage you to read a couple of responses that I gave along these lines around four years ago. Here's one. Here's the other. I think these might help to answer the second part of your question.

Thanks for asking your questions, Julius, and may God bless you.  - Father Bill

 

“Did Judas actually sin since he fulfilled the prophecy
to hand Jesus to His enemies? - Justin

Father Bill:

Judas for lack of a better word (sold out) to the Romans and turned over Jesus. My question is was Judas forgiven for his sin?  Since he was fulfilling the prophecy did he actually sin?  Thanks. -   Justin

___________________________

Dear Justin:

Your question really has two parts. Did Judas actually sin by his betrayal? If he did sin, was he forgiven?

As to whether Judas actually sinned, the simple truth is that he did choose to betray Jesus, and that would be sin. He could have chosen otherwise, but he apparently was motivated by greed and perhaps by disillusionment with the kind of Messiah that Jesus was turning out to be. His choice was objectively sinful. The fact that his sin fulfilled a prophecy does not mean that the prophecy caused his sin.

Still, one could argue that his worst choice was to despair of God's mercy. Apparently believing that his sin was unforgivable, he committed suicide. Simon Peter also betrayed his master by publicly denying that he knew him, but he wept bitter tears of contrition and accepted God's merciful forgiveness. 

(If your question has to do with how God's foreknowledge affects human free will, I would encourage to read this response that I gave to that matter a few years ago.)

As to whether Judas was forgiven for his sin, only God can know. It would not at all surprise me that, in the very last moments of his life, Judas truly repented of his sins and allowed God's mercy to rescue him. - Father Bill

 

“I bought stock shares from a stock company and now
it diversified to include abortion drugs.  What
does Church Law say?” – Harmon

Father Bill:

I bought shares of stock in a company on the stock market. Now the company has diversified its product line to include abortion causing drugs. What does church law say I should do? - Harmon

______________________________

Dear Harmon:

That's a great question. Thanks for asking.

I don't know of any Church law that specifically tells a shareholder what to do in a circumstance such as yours. After all, we live in a complex society with divergent views as to what is and is not morally acceptable, and Church law simply cannot anticipate or legislate for every possibility. Just as your investment in this company plays a tiny role in producing products, some of which you find morally wrong, so also do your taxes play a tiny role in supporting policies and services, some of which you find morally wrong. We simply cannot escape the social and moral complexities of our culture.

That said, I do have some ideas for you to consider. Perhaps you have thought of some of these yourself:

-Write a letter to the company president and/or the board of directors indicating your concern.
-Sell the stock and invest in a company that conforms more to your beliefs. (If you're concerned about a large capital gains hit, you might check with a stockbroker or tax adviser to see if there are ways to avoid that.) Of course, selling your stock simply means that someone else is buying it at that price. It doesn't hurt the company, but it might make you feel better.
-Sell the stock and distribute the proceeds to charitable organizations. (This eliminates the capital gains issue and also turns something that is morally questionable into something good.)

For future investments, consider buying mutual funds or ETFs that support Catholic values. Just do a Google search on Catholic values mutual funds or ETFs. You will find that there is a pretty good variety to choose from. I personally hold shares in a Catholic values fund that is well regarded by Morningstar and other rating entities. It has done quite well for me.

I hope that I've been able to help you as you ponder how best to proceed. Incidentally, my personal opinion is that you are not obligated to sell this stock. However, as I noted earlier, you might feel better if you did.
-  Father Bill

 


CATHOLICVIEW PRIEST STAFF

“In bible study I said we receive grace from the
Eucharist.  Our priest said “You believe that?”
and laughed.  I don't understand.- Julie

Father:

In referring to the Eucharist in a Catholic bible study, I commented that people receive grace from the sacrament.   The priest said, "You really believe that!?"   I said, ,"Yes, I do".  He laughed and said, "You are a fool".  I realize there are impediments to receiving grace but he didn't go further.  I left feeling sad and now seem like I am branded a conservative, like that is a bad thing. Father is distant and unfriendly and I feel like an outsider in my church.  I don't understand.  Julie

_____________________________

Julie:

I don't understand why your parish priest would say what you reported.  I find what you reported about your parish priest's words as very upsetting and offensive.  To me, in my parish, there are no such thing as a person with conservative and liberal interpretations of our faith in Christ Jesus.  All I am concerned about is the TRUTH.  I always ask, is this teaching or scriptural interpretation true?  The Church, through its magisterium, teaches  the truth as found in the scriptures and in our oral traditions passed down to us from the apostles themselves.

What you answered is TRUE.  You are not incorrect in saying that "people receive grace from the sacrament."  This is true.  This is NOT a conservative or liberal stance.  It is a truth that supercedes any so-called  human categories of conservative or liberal.   Grace is the ultimate gift of God, salvation itself, through no effort on our part other than accepting this grace with an open heart and total faith.  The Eucharist gives sanctifying grace which affects my soul, my entire being, on a supernatural level.  Through the Eucharist, my soul is orientated to Christ as Food for my entire being.  Jesus is the Bread of Life, and Jesus' love and mercy is the lifeblood of my being.  That is what is called by the Church as sanctifying grace. 

To simplify something so great as God's total mercy and gift called grace, grace can be defined as relationship with God as well as the total gift of mercy and salvation.  There are two defined categories of grace:  actual grace and sanctifying grace.  Actual grace is the everyday relationship I have with God made stronger through every day acts of goodness and kindness.  Every time I do something in love, my relationship with God is strengthened.  And with my relationship with God strengthened, I can do what seems impossible, and overcome temptation that comes my way daily.

Sanctifying grace is a specific relationship I have with God that affects my being and my identity as a human being.  These specific relationships are made in the reception of each sacrament as follows:  Baptism:  relationship to God the Father as my Father, Jesus as my brother and Lord, and the Holy Spirit as the love that God has for me as His child; Confirmation:  relationship to God as His prophet, as the speaker for God in a world that needs to hear the truth of God; Holy Eucharist:  my relationship with Jesus as Food and Bread of life; Penance:  my relationship with Jesus as Forgiver, Healer, and Savior; Holy Matrimony:  my relationship with God as Love and my relationship with Jesus as Spouse (Husband) of His bride, the Church (all believers in Jesus Christ); Holy Orders:  my relationship with God as His presence in the world; Anointing of the Sick (Extreme Unction):  my relationship to God as Healer and Mender of Broken Souls. 

As you can see, the Holy Eucharist not only "gives grace" through its reception, it establishes a clear relationship with God as the One who can fulfill my every hunger.  I am so happy to hear that you are well versed in your Catholic faith.  And please, don't let anyone bully you by suggesting you know little of the "wisdom of this world."  You know Jesus Christ, and you know Him in the Holy Eucharist.  That is more important and valuable than in any pretense of intellectual pride that your parish priest has shown you at his so-called bible study.   May the Lord bless you for standing on His truth.  - Father Cervantes

“My father, 87, divorced my mother after 40 years
and goes to Mass with his girlfriend.  Too old to
commit adultery, is this justified in the Church?”
 - John

Priest Staff:

My elderly Father (87) divorced my Mother after 40 years but still goes to Mass and receives the sacraments with his girlfriend who has converted.  Though no longer "able" to commit "adultery", I want to know how this is justified in the eyes of the Church and condoned with my Catholic relatives.  I look at the hypocrisy and refuse to be a part of the situation or the church. – John

__________________________ 

John:

I am not quite sure what your father's situation is in regards to the Church.  You do not say if he is living with his "girlfriend," nor do you say whether your father and "girlfriend" are married.  As long as your divorced father is not in an adulterous relationship (that means not only sexual but emotional as well), and is not living with this "girlfriend," he is free to receive the sacraments as your mother is as well.  If your father is living with this woman and/or is married to her civilly, then he cannot receive the sacraments. 

I am sorry to hear of your pain as you see your father seemingly callously throw away 40 years of marriage and family.  But I want you to know that the Church is not condoning your father's relationship if it is truly adulterous.  I cannot speak for your relatives.  I can only speak of our Church's teaching that a sacramental marriage is lifelong unless it is proven through an annulment process that the marriage was not a sacramental marriage in the first place.  Your father will be accountable to God for his actions. 

Leave judgment to God and you must live your life with faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and Judge.  - CatholicView Priest Staff 

“My mom is 93 and legally blind, on oxygen,
and legally blind.  Can she become Catholic
without the normal process? - Jennifer

CatholicView Priest Staff:

My mother is 93, legally blind, on oxygen 24/7 and very hard of hearing. Can she join the church without going through the instruction process? -Jennifer

______________________________

Jennifer:

Yes, your mother can be received into full communion with the Catholic Church without going through the Rites of Christian Initiation process.  Pleased talk to your parish priest or deacon about this matter.  There may be some catechetical teaching involved to make sure that your mother is aware of being brought into the Catholic Church.  – CatholicView Priest Staff

“Our Priest wears his knit cap into the Church. 
Is this appropriate?” - Susan

Father Cervantes:

Our Priest wears his knit cap into the Church and into the Sanctuary. I find it disrespectful. Is this now appropriate? If not what can we do to change this behavior. - Susan

________________________

Susan:

I am reminded of an event in my parish that set off a firestorm of controversy and many had to learn what it means NOT TO JUDGE. One Sunday morning at our very large parish, a young man came into our church for Sunday Mass wearing a baseball cap. He came with his family as usual.

The usher TOLD the young man to take off his hat. The young man said that he would not since he needed to keep the hat on. The usher said that it was disrespectful and wanted the young man to take off his hat. The usher was making a terribly negative scene and the family was responding in a protective and equally negative manner.

I was called on the scene. The young man was upset and crying now. His family was so upset with him vowing never again to come to church.  After a quick investigation and trying to calm down both parties (while the whole congregation was watching with anxiousness), I found out that the young man had cancer, and the chemo-therapy had robbed him of all his hair. He wanted to keep his hat on not only for cosmetic purposes but also for keeping his head warm in the cool weather at the time.  He needed that hat for his own sense of security as well.

I apologized to the family and told them to please stay and pray for peace of mind and heart. Then I took the usher aside and we had a long talk.  Needless to say, everyone learned a valuable lesson: do not judge. Jesus told us so in Matthew Chapter 7, Verses 1-5: "Stop judging that you may not be judged." That young man wore his hat to church until the day of his death when he succumbed to cancer. He was buried with his signature hat.

There is no liturgical rule ANYWHERE in the Catholic Church that says one shouldn't wear a hat in church. If someone decides to wear a hat in church, then I think that there must be a reason that person wears that hat and I won't question their decision to wear a hat.  Bishops, priests, deacons can wear a skull cap (zucchetto: white for popes, cardinal red for Cardinals, reddish purple for bishops; black for priests and deacons) during Mass while bishops and abbotts wear their mitres. 

In other faiths, wearing a hat or head covering is a sign of respect before the Lord.  Military customs sometimes (usually in honor guard situations) dictate wearing a hat indoors even in church. There must be a reason why your priest wears a head cover during Mass. Do not judge. There must be a reason why he wears it. If you are so curious about it, please ask him yourself without being judgmental. You can ask him, "Why do you wear your knit cap during Mass?" Do not say judgmentally, "You know it's disrespectful to wear a hat in Church, so why do you do it?"

But there is no liturgical or canonical rule that says one shouldn't wear a head covering while in church. Every culture on earth has its own "rules" about wearing head coverings in specific situations. In God's eyes, He is just happy that a person is partaking of the Eucharistic feast of His Son's Body and Blood and doesn't see the outward appearances (or hats) but the heart and soul. - Father Cervantes

“What is the purpose of penance and self-denial?”
- Pat  

CatholicView Priest Staff:

What is the purpose of penance and self-denial?  I have never understand how that can bring us closer to God or how it can be something a merciful and loving God wants us to do.  – Pat

 ________________________________

Pat:

I also wonder why people enjoy exercising their bodies and do all sorts of disciplined things and diets for their physical health.   But we are told by our medical experts that by dieting and exercising, we can not only extend our lives but also improve our quality of life.  God doesn't demand any one of us to do anything for our health, but people do it anyway to live better lives.  The same for our spiritual bodies, our souls.  If we don't exercise our souls with penance, fasting and prayer, then our spiritual lives become obese with temptation, sinful inclinations, and moral confusion.  Jesus mentioned to his disciples that once He left, that they would fast as He said in Matthew 9:15:  The days will come when the bridegroom is taken from them, and then they will fast.  Even Jesus said that certain types of prayer demands fasting, especially exorcisms, in Mark 9:29.  The early church leadership prayed and fasted as a spiritual discipline before they ordained anyone to lead congregations as described in Acts 14:23:  They appointed presbyters for them in each church, and with prayer and fasting, commended them to the Lord in whom they had put their faith.  God doesn't need our prayer, fasting, and penance.  We need prayer, fasting, and penance to get our souls and spiritual bodies into shape to fight against evil, to stay faithful to God, and to bring peace and joy to all we meet in the name of Jesus the Lord.  Prayer, fasting, and penance does bring me closer to God as I shed the sinful inclinations of my spiritual self.  Without it, people become spiritually sick and obese with sin.  – CatholicView Priest Staff

 

“I may have done something disrespectful to my
parents.  After their death I had them cremated. 
Have I sinned?” - Karl

Please Father:

I need your help. I think I may have punished my parents. I respected their wishes about 10 years ago of cremated them after death but shortly afterward was told cremating instead of burial is a sin against GOD.  Have I sinned? - Karl

____________________________

Karl:

Cremation, the burning of a deceased body to ashes, is not sinful nor is it something against the rules of the Church.  You have not sinned.  You followed your parents' wishes.  If cremation was sinful, then how about the people who died in fires and were burned to death, leaving nothing behind but ashes?  The only thing that the Church requires as a testimony of our faith in the resurrection from the dead at the end of time is that our deceased bodies and our deceased ashes be placed in one place such as a cemetery.  The Church doesn't like the scattering of ashes as it does not give testimony that one day, our bodies will rise in a glorified state at the end of time.  Please, you have not sinned in this regards.  Go in peace,  -  Father Cervantes

“My six grandchildren are taught that I go to a
bad Church and cannot be saved.  What
should I say” - Kathleen

Father:

My six grandchildren are being taught that "Grammy" goes to a bad (Catholic) church, is not a Christian, and cannot be saved.  What can I say to them? - Kathleen

_____________________________

Kathleen:

I am sorry that the parents of your grandchildren are so mean spirited to say and teach their children these lies about our Christian faith.  You should talk to your grandchildren's parents about this matter since talking to your grandchildren about this could be counter-productive.  But talking to the parents would be imperative.   Ask them to stop this hate message about you. 

Your grandchildren should love you without any caveats such as your Catholic faith.  What you can do is tell your grandchildren that you accept and believe in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and that you know you are going to heaven.  That's all you need to say to them if they should bring up their parental hate for you again.  - God bless you.  -  Father Cervantes

 “Is there a modern day saint like me who went to
prison but did not commit a crime?” - Bryan

Father:

I spend 2-3 hours a day in prayer and frequently receive communion.   I made an act of contrition 10 years ago to live a celibate life which I will keep the rest of my life.  I live a life of penance.  I was wondering if there was a modern day saint who was wrongly imprisoned yet spent his life in prison praying for many and died there.  I accept that I have committed no crime and don’t intend to but I am facing prison and decided I will go instead of committing suicide, a plan to be in constant prayer there in the austere conditions.  Is there a modern day saint that like me went to prison that did not commit a crime?  Some one I can study and give me inspiration to face what I have to face. - Bryan

_____________________________

Bryan:

I am not clear why you are saying that you are going to prison.  So, I am unable to give counsel as to your particular situation.  But you asked if there was a "modern" saint that was imprisoned wrongly and unjustly to study and follow as an example.  There were MANY in our church's history that fit your description.  But one that comes to mind immediately is Saint Maximilian Kolbe, a Franciscan priest who was imprisoned by the Nazi's during World War II, a Polish priest (please see this link for a summary of his life:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maximilian_Kolbe ) who gave up his life for another.

Here is a little story and video about his life in this link:  https://www.catholic.org/saints/saint.php?saint_id=370  May the Lord give you strength and peace in what is ahead.  Jesus is always with you!  Always.  - Father Cervantes

 

“Does Psalm 144:1 conflict with "Thou shalt
not kill"? – Thomas
 

Father:

Does Psalm 144:1 conflict with "Thou shalt not kill"? – Thomas

 ____________________________________

Thomas:

Psalm 144 begins with this verse:  Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for battle, my fingers for war.  This particular psalm was a prayer hymn sung in the Temple as the Israelites were preparing to protect their country, and in particular, Jerusalem, from foreign armies that wanted to subject Israel to their whims.  The commandment, You shall not kill, does not imply that we cannot act in self-defense.  All throughout the Hebrew Scriptures (the Old Testament), self-defense was never considered killing or murder if another's life was taken in battle.  Notice that at the end of this psalm, the song writer states (Psalm 144:14): May there be no breach in the walls, no exile, no outcry in our streets.  Happy the people for whom things are thus; happy the people whose God is the Lord.  This is a psalm praising God and asking for His aid in the self-defense of Israel.  There is no conflict between the commandment, You shall not kill (murder), and the concept of self-defense.  Self-defense is demanded at times.  – CatholicView Priest Staff
 

“I'm worried that my baptism is invalid.” - Laura

CatholicView Priest Staff:

I'm worried that my baptism is invalid.  The Monsignor made a mistake and confirmed me first...then baptized me when I asked him after that when I would be baptized.  During the baptism he kept forgetting my name and kept saying Marybeth when my name is Laura Beth.  Obviously, he didn't know me well, I was brand new to the parish.  -  Laurie

 ____________________________

Laura:

All that is demanded for a valid baptism is the pouring of water over the person and the words (and your faith in Jesus), I baptize you in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit (Matthew 28:19).  From what you described, your baptism was valid and I congratulate you in being in full communion in the Catholic Church.  Praise Jesus, Lord and Savior! -   CatholicView Priest Staff

“My Brother-in-law is my three children’s godfather. 
I found out later he was not Catholic but agnostic. 
What should we do?” - Michelle

 

Father:

My husband and I have been married for 15 yrs and we have known one another all of our lives (age 3). We have 2 sons 13 and 11. When they were born we asked my husband's brother to be their godfather. We recently found out that he is an agnostic and was at the time of the boys' Baptisms. My husband's parents and two sisters knew this at the time and never said a word, in fact my mother-in-law was the person who obtained a letter for my brother in law being in good standing in the Catholic Church which we were also unaware of at the time. We feel incredibly betrayed for the lies by everyone and making matters worse we are being told we are making mountains out of mole hills. That nothing wrong was done and we should apologize for being angry to them. I take my faith very seriously and forgiveness is not difficult for me or my husband to give but we do not believe we should subject ourselves or our children to this kind of twisted thinking. We have tried over the last 4 yrs to explain our position but the demand that we give an apology is always the final note. My husband's mother passed last year and while all of his siblings were afforded the opportunity to see her in the hospital he was cruelly notified after her death. He had many conversations with her prior to passing and this is all he has to hang onto.  His father, sisters and brother believe they were justified because we would not acquiesce and admit that they were right and we were the ones who had caused the insult. My husband's family is caught up in PC, and perception and the telling or truth was in their actions of taking away his last most precious moments with his mother, he dismissed their protocol and mourned in private. We have left the door open to his father but have clearly stated there will be no one sided apologies do we need to do more? – Michelle

_______________________________

Michelle:

Family demands and expectations can take on deceptive actions when terms like "godparents" become all important, more important than the sacrament of baptism itself.  The sacrament of baptism was VALID no matter what the spiritual condition of the baptismal sponsors (godparents) were.  There isn't anything you can do about a past situation that started off in deception.  The present time is real, and what you do now is what counts, not what happened in the past. 

You mentioned that you have argued this point for the past four years.  This does not bode well for any kind of peaceful co-existence with your in-laws.  This was clearly seen by their actions in shunning your husband and you when it came to the death of his mother, your mother-in-law.  What was done to you was terribly hurtful and showed their negativity to you. 

You say that forgiveness is not difficult, but holding on for four years and demanding an apology from those who feel that they have done no wrong means that you have NOT forgiven them, even if they do not know what they have done nor want to acknowledge their deceptive actions. 

I advise you to STOP the constant demand for apologies and move forward.  Your children belong to God and are members of Christ's Body, the Church.  That is more important than anything else.  Your Christian example that you give your children is more important!  When they see you argue in front of your in-laws, or speak badly about them, they learn from your example and words, and they may be learning that there is no such thing as forgiveness and moving on to the future.  You ask, "Do we need to do more?"  I say with a strong conviction:  STOP.  You have done enough.  

Let it go and let God be the Judge, and I guarantee you, God will hold them accountable for their actions against you and your husband.  But you need to let the Lord do His Will in regards to your in-laws.  You must attend to the material and spiritual needs of your family according to God's Will and Plan.  Stop focusing on the in-laws.  Ask the Lord to help you be silent and try to live in a peaceful co-existence with them.  Your constant arguing with them will solve nothing but add more negative feelings. You must go forward and share the joy of your Catholic faith with your children.  That is God's Will at this time for you, not trying to get something from your in-laws that won't be coming any time soon. – CatholicView Priest Staff

“I am not Catholic and want to enroll my son in a
Catholic School but was told I must attend Mass. 
Is this true? - Jack

Father Cervantes:

My son is due to start in a Catholic school, which I agree with.  But to enter this school I have been told I must attend church with his mother, (We are no longer in a relationship) in order to impress the priest. It is also tradition I have been told. I am not Catholic so do not want to go to church but will not stop my son if he wants to be Catholic.   I have asked for a meeting with the Priest in order to discuss this and would like some advice in what to discuss because it is important for me, that my son enters this school. - Jack

______________________

Jack:

I am grateful to God that you and the mother of your beloved son have decided to send him to Catholic school.  Speaking as a pastor with a school attached to our parish ministry, education in a Catholic school involves more than the ABCs.  It also involves motivation, discipline, moral and spiritual growth in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior.  With that in mind, I do not expect any non-Catholic parent to go to our parish church just to impress me.  I am already impressed that you as parents have decided to make financial sacrifices to provide a Catholic education for your son.  I really dislike it when people make up things as you have described, such as going to church to impress anyone attached to the school staff.  But what we do expect parents to do is to provide a continuing support for their student at home, to encourage and to agree with us in the development of the moral Christian character of your student son.  Since the mother of your son is Catholic, we do expect her to come to church with her son as a specific way to support the message of Catholic living.  As for you, it is important that you support your son in going to church.  That means that when your son visits you for the weekend that you provide the means for him to go to church.  When you see the parish priest, just simply explain that you are not Catholic and that you will not be attending services at the parish.  But you must say that you will take your son to church when he is with you on the weekends.  That's a must as a way to support the Christian message that he is receiving in Catholic school.  As a pastor, I understand your position and I do not expect anything other than being involved in the parish school functions but not necessarily church functions.  You do only what is comfortable to you.  So, be at peace and don't be anxious about what you will say to your pastor.  All I want to hear is that you will be supportive of your son's Catholic education when he is with you.  Once again, thank you for your sacrifice in giving your son a Catholic education. - Father Cervantes

“My first marriage was annulled and I want to remarry
in the Church.  Will a second marriage also appear
on the permanent record? – Ray

Father:

I have been civilly divorced for nearly two years. My marriage was fully annulled by the Catholic church and I am now free to remarry in good standing with the church.  I will soon be beginning the process of remarrying in the church.  I know the church of my baptism receives and maintains all of my sacramental records.  Since they have recorded my first marriage and it is now fully annulled, will they be purging their records of the "marriage" that did not exist in the eyes of the church?  Will a second marriage appear on the permanent record in place of the annulled marriage?  Several local priests have not been able to answer this one for me.  Please answer this if you are able to.  Blessings. Ray

_____________________________ 

Ray:

Your church of your baptism does keep all your sacramental records as you have stated.  Your first marriage is recorded there and the decree of annulment is also recorded there.  There is no such thing as expunging the sacramental records.  Your second (and sacramental) marriage will be recorded there was well.  Canon law demands that all sacramental records be kept diligently (Canons 875-878).  Congratulations on your upcoming sacramental marriage!  May the Lord bless you and keep you and your bride in His loving embrace!  - CatholicView Priest Staff

“Is it a sin to commit sinful acts as an actor
in a play/movie? - Steve 

Father:

Is it a sin to commit sinful acts as an actor in a play/movie?  I'm considering pursuing acting as a career, and this question is the one thing holding me back.  While I personally don't feel like committing sinful acts while acting carries over anything negative to my personal life, I would like to be absolutely sure I'm not committing a sin here.  Steve

______________________________ 

Steve:

You and many actors have had serious questions about the morality of their craft when it comes to certain scenes in which "sinful acts" are portrayed.  As a Catholic and a follower of Christ, your integrity is ALL IMPORTANT.  If you feel that any scene is not within your moral and spiritual life, then please, do not do this act.  There are many Christian actors who always make it clear their limitations concerning certain immoral scenes and are successful.  Maintain your integrity!  There are support groups for Catholic actors!  Here is an article about it.  Maybe you can join them!  http://www.catholicdigest.com/articles/people/celebrities/2012/12-14/catholics-in-hollywood  Hope this helps.  -CatholicView Priest Staff

 

“I am Catholic and my fiancé is a Pentecost Christian
and wants our marriage in her church.  What is your
advice to handle this?” - John

Father:

I'm a Roman Catholic and my soon to be bride is a Pentecost Christian.  She'd like to have the wedding ceremony at her church officiated by her pastor.  She was born and raised into that church and has very strong relationships with her pastor.  I on the other hand am a Roman Catholic and my parents/family would like to have a RC Wedding.

We've decided to do 2 ceremonies.. the first would be hers where we'd sign the legal papers, then the RC ceremony where we'd take part in the communion and exchange rings.

Can this be done? What is your advice to handle this? – John

 __________________________

John:

Yes, what you described can be done.  I also would like to suggest another option that would make things easier.  You do need to receive a dispensation for disparity of cult ("mixed religion") before you are married in the Catholic Church.  By receiving this dispensation, you can also receive a dispensation from form (having your sacramental marriage done outside a Catholic church building) that will enable you to have your wedding in the Pentecostal congregation recognized as a Catholic sacramental marriage. You could even have your priest or deacon come to that Pentecostal church to bless your wedding though the minister of the Pentecostal congregation will preside and accept your spoken marital vows.  I have done that on several occasions as pastor of my large parish church.  I would go to another Christian congregation and I would have a part in imparting a Catholic marital blessing.  You need to talk to your parish priest and deacon.  The option you mentioned in your question is also acceptable with two ceremonies, one happening in the Pentecostal congregation and another in the Catholic Church.  May the Lord bless your marriage with joy, faithful love, and peace.   – Father Cervantes

“I was healed by proxy when my wife attended a
Catholic healing service.  Is this a valid witness
of power of Sacrament Healing?” – Xavier

Father Cervantes:

Would this be a valid witness of the power of the Sacrament of Healing?
I was in pain with a doctor diagnosed hiatal hernia. He gave a prescription for the pain and sent me home. The next day my wife asked me to go to the church as there was going to be a healing service with the sacrament of healing. I was not up to it and decided to stay home and try the medicine she had just picked up for me.
She went to the service and I crawled back into bed after taking the pain pill.
About 30 minutes later, I experienced a truly remarkable feeling of the pain leaving my body. I could almost see it being pulled out my chest and totally drifting away. I was stunned. My first reaction was, "WOW, what a great pain pill that was."
When my wife came back, she was all a glow. She told me that the Priest asked her what her ailment was and she said she was asking for my healing, not one for herself. The Priest anointed her and immediately she broke into a deep sobbing uncontrollable cry. A friend sitting with her said, "You have just received a healing". My wife, a very shy and non-demonstrative person was confused and a little embarrassed.
The timing as we determined, was the same as my pain relief. We were certain that it was healing from God.
The pain never came back, even after 20 years. I never took another one of those pills and my doctor assured me that there was no longer any hernia.

So, can some one be healed by proxy through this sacrament? Or was this something other than a sacramental healing. Can I witness to others that my healing was the result of the sacramental anointing administered to my wife, or through my wife?  I don't want to say anything that would be doctrinally incorrect.  Thank you for any help you can offer. – Xavier

___________________________

Xavier:

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow.  God did heal you!  How it happened is even more amazing!  You are so blest!  God has performed a miracle in your life.  Even though the Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick is for that particular anointed person (there is no such thing as a proxy for a sacrament now-a-days, though the Sacrament of Marriage can still be done by proxy, though that is extremely rare), God has looked with favor on your wife's faith and you were healed.  Please, share your healing testimony with all you see so that others may know that God hears our prayers!  And you had better treat your wife with the greatest of love.  It was your wife's faith that saved you!  And it was the Holy Spirit that touched you.  You can say that God healed you through your wife's prayer and her accepting the Anointing of the Sick.  It is not doctrinally incorrect, as you say.  – Father Cervantes

 

“Is it true that the Hebrews called the Ten
Commandments only suggestions?”
- Nicole

Father,

Someone said that the Hebrews called the Ten Commandments "suggestions, or propositions" and NOT 'Commandments'.  Is this true??.  Thank you.   – Nicole
___________________________

Nicole: 

Who are you talking to?  No where, and I mean, no where, is the ten commandments considered suggestions or propositions in the Hebrew Scrptures (the Old Testament).  The ten commandments are considered LAW, with the force of LAW in the Mosaic covenant.  The ten commandments are not nice moral suggestions.  The ten commandments are God's Law within the Mosaic covenant between the people of Israel and Him.   – CatholicView Priest Staff

“How can I reaffirm to Jesus after purposely
sinning?” - David

CatholicView Priest Staff:

How to reaffirm to Jesus after purposely sinning.  I left the church to make money and stopped God's work and I watch porno films knowing it was wrong against my wife and I was hateful to my wife and children. Please help.  I know I was wrong and I have returned to Church and stopped all sin and keep God in my mind 24/7. I want my God back.  – David

____________________________ 

David:

Each day, as you awake, say, "Lord Jesus, you are my Lord and Savior forever.  Help me live this day in accordance with your gospel and Will."  By coming back to the Church, you have come back to God!  Now, I want you to do something.  I need you to make an appointment with your parish priest for the purpose of doing a "general confession," and to discuss your past and your commitment to begin again.  Please read this link about a general confession:  http://www.catholicity.com/devoutlife/1-19.html  - CatholicView Priest Staff 

CATHOLICVIEW STAFF

“Why did God make me if I might spend eternity
 in hell? – Paula

CatholicView Staff:

Why did God make me if there is a chance that I could spend eternity in hell?  Isn’t it a huge risk? – Paula

_____________________________

Dear Paula:

Thank you for your Interesting question.  What you are not taking into consideration is that God, in His Almighty mercy and His love, have given all of us Free Will to choose where we will spend eternity.  It will be our choice to love and serve Him or to choose to go our own way and live sinfully.  We can decide to turn our backs on His teaching and do “our own thing” or through faith, believe in His Son Who died for our salvation. 

So where is the risk?  Do you believe and have faith in God?  Are you willing to accept what Jesus is offering to you freely? 

Please think about this.  You are loved.  God wants you to come and live with Him when you die.  The price has already been paid for by Jesus Christ on the cross.  Always keep in mind that we are not perfect but IF we fall into sin, the Lord, through love, will forgive you, over and over again, if you are truly sorry and repentant.  God made you and gave you a way to live with Him forever.  Will you take His gift of eternity?  -   CatholicView Staff

“Is pride a sin?  -  Robert

CatholicView Staff:

Since pride is a sin, then is it also a sin to be proud?   Being proud of an accomplishment, a person or anything else? - Robert

___________________________

Robert:

There is nothing wrong with feeling that you have accomplished something wonderful.  It is only a sin to brag and be arrogant about our successes.  You do not sin when you are grateful to God, thanking Him for giving you the ability to accomplish something unique.  What we must not do is feel we are better than others.  We are all born with the propensity for pride therefore we should be mindful of this, and as Christian Catholics avoid boasting and bragging.

Keep in mind that all good things that come to us is a blessing from God and we must be humble and thankful to the one Who is the source of all our prosperities.

Hope this helps!  - God bless you always.  - CatholicView Staff

“Is Catholicism Christian or not?”  - Vinnie

CatholicView Staff:

I have a CATHOLIC (not Protestant) friend who insists that Catholicism is NOT Christian; that those are 2 different things. Is Catholicism Christian or not? - Vinnie

________________________

Dear Vinnie:

Here is your answer simply put:  If ANYONE believes in Jesus Christ, they  are Christians.  It is true non-Catholics have time and again ask "what Church do you belong to".  You answer Catholic.  Unfortunately they say, “I am Christian”.

No one should claim Catholics are not Christian.  Our faith is based on Jesus Christ.  Without this, the Church cannot stand.  A Christian, simply put, is someone who believes that Jesus is our Messiah Who has paid for our entry into heaven.  Without Him there is no salvation and no eternity.

In the Nicene creed, from 325 C.E., Catholics profess:

We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ, the only Son of God, eternally begotten of the Father, God from God,
Light from Light, true God from true God, begotten, not made, one in being with the Father.
Through Him all things were made.
For us and our salvation He came down from heaven: by the power of the Holy Spirit,
He was born of the Virgin Mary, and became man. For our sake He was crucified
under Pontius Pilate; He suffered, died, and was buried.
On the third day He rose again in fulfillment of the scriptures: He ascended into heaven
and is seated at the right hand of the Father.
He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and His kingdom will have no end.
We accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior.  We are baptized as Jesus commanded in
Matthew 28:19, "in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." 

Tell your friend to talk to his parish priest about this.  He will be able to reset his perspective on this matter.  May the Lord give him the clarity to see and understand, through prayer to our heavenly Father, the peace that only God can give him.  - CatholicView Staff

“My ex-wife and I were married in the Catholic Church.
If I get an annulment, will I need to be remarried in the
Church?” - Don

CatholicView Staff:

I was married in the Catholic Church and then divorced. I have since been remarried outside of the church in a civil union.  If I get an annulment from my first marriage what does that mean for my current marriage?  Does the church recognize it or do I need to be remarried in the church? - Don

_______________________________

Dear Don:

You are correct in saying that in the eyes of the Church, you are still married to your first wife.  If you get a church annulment, you can then obtain a Church blessing of your present marriage by your priest.  Once this is accomplished, your current union will be recognized by the Church and you will be able to participate in the sacraments.

Please make an appointment to talk to your parish priest.  He will discuss with you the process of annulment and once this is obtained you can then receive the blessing of your marriage.  God bless you.  - CatholicView Staff

“My ex-wife divorced me.  I met a non-Catholic
and we married.  Can I take the Eucharist?”
 - Richard
 

CatholicView:

My ex-wife initiated our divorce. She fell in love with someone else.  I met a wonderful non-catholic woman and we married.   May I still receive the Holy Eucharist? - Richard

_________________________

Richard:

At this time you must refrain from taking communion. 

The first thing you must do is apply for an annulment from your first marriage.  According to Catholic Church teaching, you are still married to your first wife.  In order to receive the Holy Eucharist again, you must speak with your parish priest in order to arrange an annulment from your first wife.  Once this is taken care of, you will be able to get your present marriage blessed by the Church,  which will you entitle you to receive communion.

Please make an appointment as soon as possible with your priest.  He will be happy to help you seek an annulment and arrange the blessing of your present marriage.  Once these things are taken care of you be able to accept the Eucharist again.  God go with you always.  - CatholicView Staff

“When does our own needs take first place in
helping others?  - Miller

CatholicView Staff:

I know that Jesus taught us to "love thy neighbor", and He sacrificed Himself for us. I think this set an example of how we should try to live, making sacrifices for the better good.  However, when is it okay to say no for our own sake?   Should we live our lives looking for ways to help other people, or should we help ourselves first, so that we can help others later? When does our own happiness matter?  Thanks, Miller

_____________________________

Miller:

All of us can give something whether it is time, money or some other way of helping those in need.  We can make time to visit the sick, maybe go to the market for a sick person who is unable to do this themselves.  And there are things that we can share such as clothing we do not wear, dropping off an overabundance of canned food at Church for the poor, or other things that will not take away from personal happiness.  In fact, as a Christian, it feels good when we lend others a hand.  And our God Who sees all will repay us in many ways.

It is true that we want to hold what God has given to us to our hearts, and like a child with a toy, refuse to let go and share.  But we must remember that we are blessed in all the things we have.  This is not to say our children should go hungry.  But to share whatever God has given to us is the right thing to do if we see or know someone in need.  Jesus said to us, “When you give to the poor or needy, you are doing it for me.”

Luke 6:38 tells us the following:  “Give and it will be given to you.  Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap.  For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”

What this means is that we help others, God will bless you in return.  Also take a look at James 2:14-17: “What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.”

When God blesses you with bountiful food, clothing or shelter, always consider your neighbor if they are in need.  Remember all things we have were given to us by God.  To share this bounty should give you happiness, knowing that you brought joy to someone else. 

Hope this helps.  – CatholicView Staff

“Can non-Catholics receive ashes at
a Catholic Church?” – Cynthia

                                      
CatholicView:

I am a non-Catholic Christian, spending the year studying Catholicism, in depth.  I know I cannot receive communion at RC churches. I'm wondering if I can receive ashes on Ash Wednesday? Thanks for your time. -  Cynthia

__________________________

Cynthia:

Please accept my apologies for the late response.  Non-Catholics can receive blessed ashes at a Catholic Ash Wednesday Mass.  The only thing they cannot do is to receive Communion.  The Code of Canon Law, canon 1170 prescribes the following:

Can. 1170 Blessings which are to be imparted first of all to Catholics, can also be given to catechumens and even to non-Catholics unless there is a prohibition of the Church to the contrary.

Therefore, the receiving of ashes upon non-Catholics falls under canon 1170.  Non-Catholics CAN receive ashes.  – CatholicView Staff
 

“Is it a sin to take birth control?” Angelica
 

CatholicView Staff:

I am married by Catholic Church.   Is it a sin to take birth control?   Am I allowed to take the Holy Eucharist? - Angelica

____________________________

Angelica:

The Catholic Church specifically bans artificial birth control.  The Church teaches that the use of mechanical, chemical, or medical procedures to prevent conception from taking place is against the openness to procreation required of marriage and must not be used.  If you practice artificial birth control, you must not receive  Holy Communion.

The Church approves of natural family planning.  Natural Family Planning is not a form of birth control.  Natural Family Planning is to be used as a natural method of regulating birth for times when there are serious health problems or a couple is having financial difficulties.  God designed the reproductive system in a way that there are times when a woman cannot conceive. 

This method of birth planning and periodic abstinence is the sole way the Church teaches is not sinful.  - CatholicView Staff

“Can a strong Catholic who attends an Anglican Church
because it is closer, become a Catholic Priest?” - Calum
 

CatholicView Staff:

If there is a strong Catholic, who wishes to become a priest but attends an high Anglican Church because it is closer to him, can he still speak to a Roman Catholic vocations director and go to a Catholic seminary? I shall be grateful for any answer.  Thank you.  Calum

 _________________________

Calum:

The answer to your question is yes, of course you can.  Please have the party speak to a Roman Catholic Vocations director who will direct you and help you make arrangements to enter a Catholic Seminary nearby.  May God bless you greatly for wanting to work for the Lord.  - CatholicView Staff

“Is it a sin to have and or want tattoos?”
 - Destiny 

CatholicView:

Is it a sin to have and or want tattoos?  And if so how can one be forgiven? - Destiny

___________________________

Destiny:

There is no official teaching against having a tattoo that I know of.  If you are not talking about radical, demonic or Satanist tattoos,  just simple ones that are not offensive or suggestive, it is permissive.   Anything intended to be sexually provocative, or offensive to God would be a wrongful action as a Catholic Christian because it is not Godly.   – CatholicView Staff

“I enjoy the homilies our new priest gives and go
to mass each day to hear him.  Is this wrong?”
 - Wendy

CatholicView Staff:

We have a new parish priest for a year and I enjoy his homily very much to the extent that I make sure I go to mass every day.   Recently I find myself in confusion if I really TRULY go for mass or just to hear his homily.  How do I plead for God help?  - Wendy

____________________________

Wendy:

If the homilies that you hear and enjoy because they reach your soul and quiet your spirit, and you come away feeling fulfilled with God's love and His grace, there is nothing wrong with this.  A good homily from a knowledgeable priest strongly brings forth our faith and belief in the Lord Jesus Christ and when this happens, it is strengthened and then fortified by receiving the Holy Eucharist.   Thanks, Wendy, for your question.  God go with you always. - CatholicView Staff

“I was sexually abused by my father at the age of 7
 and now he is threatening to leave my son out of
his will” - Anthony

CatholicView Staff:

I was sexually abused by my father at the age of 7. He has never admitted or apologized for his actions.  He considers himself a sincere and devout Catholic and is clearly convinced that going to confession and giving to charity mitigates any offense.   I remain his victim and am very distressed - but don't know what to do?  Now grown up, I have a son of my own but my father has made it very clear to me that if I don't Tow the Line, my son will be left out of his Will.  My father continues to verbally abuse me and seems to have 'something evil' about him.  I always been willing to forgive but his abusive manner makes this impossible.  Please help.  Any sensible advice would be appreciated.  I would rather control this situation within the family - not in public - but if I speak out, my own son will be targeted.  -  Anthony

______________________________

Anthony:

I am so sorry to hear that your father sexually abused you as a child.  And continues to threaten and dictate to you and your son.  It is to your credit that you would want to honor him, but in this case, you have tried to overlook all the pain he has done to you and is still causing. 

Do not allow his terrible behavior to continue.  It is better to not receive monies than to have someone like your father continue to mentally abuse you.  Going to confession means Godly change and he is unwilling to do this.  But Almighty God sees and knows everything.  No confession will help him if he does not make a decent effort to repair the sinful damage he has done to you all these years. 

Please move on.  Pray and ask the Lord to strengthen you to get past this.  Money is NOT everything.  Peace is.  Wash your hands of this nightmare you are living and make your own way for yourself and your wonderful son.  God go with you.  –CatholicView Staff

“My boyfriend is Catholic and I am not.  Both of us
are divorced.  Will the Church advise him to give me
up because we are intimate? - Karen 

CatholicView Staff:

My new gentleman friend is devout Catholic.   I am Baptist. He is 59 & divorced.  I am 50 & divorced also.   Will he be advised to "give me up" because we've become intimate? - Karen

__________________________

Karen:

Unless your friend, a devout Catholic, has an annulment from his first marriage, he is committing serious adultery as he is still married to his first wife in the eyes of the Church. 

If you plan to marry a Catholic, you may also be required to get an annulment since you also have been married and divorced.  Either way you are living in sin because you are indulging in fornication.

Tell you Catholic gentleman friend that he must confess his behavior as soon as possible.  He must not receive communion in his present state of sin.  He must make an appointment to discuss these matters with his priest.  Please do not be a party to this.  - Catholic View Staff

 “I am pregnant with my 4^th child and Natural Family        
Planning is not working.  My partner wants me to use
hospital family planning.  Can you help?” - Isabel

CatholicView Staff:

I am pregnant with my 4th child & even though we tried natural family planning it is not working.  My partner is not Catholic and is encouraging me to take family planning at the hospital.  I feel like I am losing control because of the unplanned pregnancies and I strongly feel I should take up family planning but I am scared as it goes against Catholic teachings.  I am in a dilemma and I need your guidance.  Thanks.  - Isabel

 ___________________________

Isabel:

We pray that you are married to your partner and not living in sin.  And you are correct in saying that any type of birth control goes against the teaching of the Church.

NFP is easier to use now.  Natural Family Planning (NFP) is based on the fact that a woman's body gives certain signs about the different phases of her monthly fertility cycle.  Catholic natural family planning teaches you to observe and interpret these signs to determine when you are fertile.  To avoid conception, one does not indulge in intercourse during this fertile time.

Please discuss this with your parish priest who can direct you to classes on Natural Family Planning.  Bring your husband with you.  Your priest will be happy to give information about classes on Natural Family Planning.   You will be surprised to see how effective NFP can be if you learn the proper procedure.  You may want to visit here for more information.   
http://www.beginningcatholic.com/catholic-natural-family-planning.html

Also many Catholic dioceses offer some kind of NFP training, and some now require NFP training as part of the standard preparation for receiving the Sacrament of Marriage.   Because the Catholic Church teaches that NFP is the only morally acceptable method of regulating birth, and diocesan training programs will happily accept non-Catholics as well.  May the Lord bless you abundantly. - CatholicView Staff

“Will my grandmother go to hell for tying her tubes?”
 - Laryssa

CatholicView Staff:

She had already had two kids and was married by age 21, and decided it was enough.  But when she got the procedure done, her Church said that she will "roast in hell."   Is it true?  Laryssa

 _____________________________

Laryssa:

I am assuming that your grandmother is beyond child bearing years.  There is one thing you must keep in mind:  You do not know if she has prayed, confessed this sin, and asked God for forgiveness.   Because we do not know this  we must not judge her.  AND we do not have the right to say that the person will roast in hell.  Only God can judge our actions.

Why not pray for your grandmother?  Ask the Lord to touch her heart and if she has not sought forgiveness, to give her the wisdom to seek it.  We will pray that she has already made her peace with our heavenly Father.  Keep praying for her.  God hears our prayers.  - CatholicView Staff 

“My husband and my 5 children watch detective
shows with sexy women.  I am pregnant with our
    6^th child and feel unloved. Please help. - Sarah
 

CatholicView Staff:

My husband and I take our faith serious, we home-school, etc. He likes to watch detective shows that show women who are seductive and scandalous.  He lets our five young children watch also.  I am also pregnant and feel very sensitive about my own body image and feel hurt when he ignores my request to not watch these shows.  What should I do? - Sarah

 _____________________________

Sarah:

I think it is time for your husband to grow up and see the damage he is inflicting on his children and on you, his pregnant wife.  It seems that your husband is a good father and husband but lacks the sensitivity that you need during this time to feel desired and loved.  To continue in this behavior is wrong.  This is a time when a husband has to be sensitive to the your feelings and to whom he claims to love. 

Tell your husband that you and he must go and talk to your parish priest about this situation.  Because you are in a state of pregnancy, this is a worry that you should not carry alone.

Call and make an appointment today.  You need answers.  - CatholicView Staff

“I was 7 years old when my parents divorced.  A friend
  told me they were going to hell so I asked Satan to
take my soul instead.  Should I worry about this?”
 -Andrew

CatholicView Staff:

When I was 7 my parents divorced. A friend told me then that they would both go to hell for divorcing. That terrified me, so I asked Satan to take my soul instead of theirs. Is this something I should be concerned about? What should I do?  - Andrew

 ______________________________

Andrew:

I think God loves you even more than you know because, as a very young child you wanted to sacrifice your own eternal life for theirs.  What a loving son you are!   You were frightened and unable to react as a grownup would. But God saw your dilemma.  God has your soul in His loving hands, not Satan’s.  You have nothing to fear.

Satan cannot claim you.  God saw your precious love and your sacrifice and your soul is in His almighty hands.  Please pray and ask the Lord to take away all fear.    

Move ahead now, knowing that Satan who taunts you, has failed.  You belong to Almighty God.  If you trust, know that your faith will carry you past all these doubts.   Your soul is secure.  Keep praying and thanking the Lord for His grace and His love.  He will give you the peace that surpasses all human understanding.  May our Heavenly Father be with you always.   - CatholicView Staff

“I am Jewish, divorced, and dating a Catholic girl.  I
 want to become Catholic. Do I need an annulment?
- Steve

Dear Fathers,

I'm Jewish and converting to Catholicism. I was married by a rabbi, not in a synagogue. I am divorced and I'm wondering if my first marriage will need to be annulled in order to marry a Catholic girl.  Thank you very much,  Steve

____________________________ 

Dear Steve:

Congratulations on being a member of our Church and your upcoming marriage.  We welcome you.

Since you have been married before and divorced, you are free to marry in the Church only if your previous spouse has died or you have obtained a declaration of nullity from the Church for this original marriage.

To marry a Catholic, the prior bond (marriage) would need to be examined through the Tribunal process.  Please see a parish priest and discuss your intention of being Catholic as well as discussing your previous marriage.  He will be able to guide you through both an annulment and your desire to become Catholic.  Again, in advance, welcome to our church.  - CatholicView Staff

“I have confessed the sin of cohabitation. 
Can I receive communion?” - Paul

CatholicView Staff:

I have confessed the sin of cohabitation, and am no longer in a sexual relationship with this person.  Can I receive communion? - Paul

 __________________________

Paul:

If you have truly asked the Lord to forgive you through confession, expressed that you are sorry and you promised to avoid this sin in the future, then you can receive the Holy Eucharist.  Please ask God to strengthen you in the future.  May our Heavenly Father be with you always.   - CatholicView Staff

“How does normal ground become hallowed
ground?” - Robert

CatholicView Staff:

How does normal ground become hallowed ground?  Can places besides churches and cemeteries become hallowed ground? - Robert

____________________________ 

Robert:

Thanks for your question.  Hallowed ground means that it has been blessed by clergy.  It is not a sacrament but is a way that the Church intervenes on behalf of the dead to implore God's blessing.  Canon Law 1 states:  "Where it is possible, the Church is to have its own cemeteries or at least areas in civil cemeteries that are designated for the deceased members of the faithful and properly blessed."

This does not mean that a Catholic person cannot be buried in a non-Catholic Cemetery.  In this case, the grave of the deceased Catholic must be properly blessed. - Hope this helps.  - CatholicView Staff

 
“My friend’s husband wants an annulment to marry
his Catholic girlfriend.  What does this do to her
children’s legitimacy?” - Amy

CatholicView Staff:

My friend is very hurt, her ex husband says he must get an annulment to marry his Catholic girlfriend. She has several children together with him. Our question is what does this do to her children's legitimacy?

________________________________

Amy:

I am so sorry to hear of the breakup of your friend's marriage.  Of course, the fact that this man has gotten an annulment DOES NOT affect his children.  He must continue to support them and share in supplying their needs until they reach legal age.  The courts will support this.  Their children will always and forever be legitimate.  They carry their father's name and nothing can change this.  In this your friend is secure. 

Please tell her that she has nothing to worry about concerning her children's legitimacy.  May the Lord strengthen your friend to move forward, knowing that our God Who sees all will bless and give her peace.  - CatholicView Staff

 
“Is inhaling or eating marijuana a sin to
Jesus Christ?” - Jesus

CatholicView Staff:

I have a curious question I really would want to know about.  I am sorry if the question is bothersome.  My question is. Is inhaling/eating marijuana a sin to our Father Jesus Christ? I don't ask because I use it, but because it’s a curiosity I have.  I look forward to hearing back from you. Thank you very much for your time and I hope you have a wonderful day!  -  Jesus

_________________________________

Jesus:

The Catholic Church frowns on marijuana because it alters the mind and is intoxicating.  Marijuana should never be an option for a Christian because one is not in control of clear thinking ability.  The late Pope John Paul II had frequently campaigned against marijuana, saying there are no distinctions between “hard” and “soft” drugs and that using marijuana is equivalent to using other mind altering drugs.

Many use the statement that marijuana is a natural plant and therefore safe.  Remember hemlock is also natural, yet is poisonous and kills.    

With marijuana, one’s thinking powers become faulty and can lead into sin.  Avoid it like the plague for it opens the gates to harder substance abuse such as cocaine.  Marijuana is not compatible for a Christian to use.  Stay away from this temptation unless there is a strong specific health need that regular medications cannot help.  -   CatholicView Staff

“Can a serial murderer or child molester go to
heaven if they accept Jesus as Savior and
regret their sins? - John

CatholicView Staff:

Can a serial murderer, or repeat child molester go to heaven if they accept Jesus as their Savior and genuinely regret their sins-- even if they continue to commit those sins over and over due to weakness in the face of temptation? - John

 ______________________________

John:

It is true that God does forgive all sin over and over again if we are repentant.  Notice, I say truly repentant of those sins that you have written about.  If someone has the propensity  to repeat a sin over and over again, without morose, then God will decide their fate.  1 Corinthians 10:13 states "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.  And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it. When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it." 

When people say they are Christians and live a lifestyle of sin, they are in danger of losing their souls for we do not know when God will call us home.  We do not know if someone who keeps sinning and at the final time before dying have asked the Lord for forgiveness.  Remember the thief on the cross who repented before dying and Jesus forgave him, saying “Today you will be with me in paradise”.   If a sinner realizes at the moment of death, that he needs God to forgive him, God will forgive for He is a loving, merciful God but He IS always is the final judge. 

“If leaving the Mass right after Communion have
I fulfilled my obligation?  Richard

CatholicView Staff:

If leaving the Mass right after Communion have I fulfilled my obligation?  Richard

 _____________________________

Richard:

There is no Canon law that tells us we cannot leave mass early.  However we must remember that the hour we give at mass is showing honor to our heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ.  During mass we are worshiping together in the house of God, the Father.  To leave immediately after taking communion without quiet reflection or taking a few minutes afterwards to thank God for sending His Son to die for us is not a good thing to do.  

At the final blessing we all say "Amen" in unison, as a believing family.  To leave early, we forfeit that final blessing.  At the dismissal, when the priest makes his way out, we are free to go forth as Christians.

There are times when leaving mass cannot be helped, such as a job, a sick child, or any obligation we must attend.  But we should never make this a practice.  Remember, we would never consider leaving immediately after dining at a friend's house would we?  So, shouldn't we spent those last few minutes honoring the Lord? - CatholicView Staff

“I’m over 80 years old and live at an assisted
care home.  I receive communion but how
shall I confess my sins? - John

CatholicView Staff:

I am over 80 years of age. I live at a small assisted-care adult home which is out in the country.  In the last year I have found no one to get me to Mass or Confession. I do receive Communion from my parish pastoral care weekly. But how do I confess my sins? - John

 ___________________________

John:

I am sorry you cannot get to Church for Confession.  Have you asked your Minister of the Eucharist about having the priest come to your home?  I am sure he will be able to accommodate you.

If you have use of a telephone at your home, please call and tell the secretary that you need to see a priest for confession and are unable to get to the church on your own.  I am sure your priest will come to your home and be most happy to hear your confession.  In the meantime, please pray directly to our heavenly Father Who loves and cares for you. Tell Him all your problems and concerns.  He is always available for you.  May God bless you always.  - John

 
“How do I get to know God in a personal way?”
 – Kaila
 

CatholicView Staff:

I believe there is God, but I do not feel him in my presence.  How do I get to know God in a personal way? –  Kaila
____________________________

Kaila:

The Book of Jeremiah 29:11 tells us “If you seek Me with all your heart, I will allow you to find Me.”  And one of the best ways to know God is through prayer.  Find a quiet place and talk to Him.  Set aside a time every day and pray. 

Like a proud parent, God created you, knows all about you, and loves you.  He knew you before you were born and He knows you personally now.  If you open your heart to Him in prayer, you will sense His Presence through the Holy Spirit.  Your prayers can be simple and short but God knows exactly what you want to say.  Here is a simple prayer for you:

 “Dear God, I believe that You love me and I want to have a relationship with You.  I want to feel Your Presence within me.  Open my heart, Lord so that I can invite you to be the center of my life.  I ask all this in through Jesus Christ, Your Son.  Amen”

I am going to give you this link on how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ for it is through Him that we get to our heavenly Father: http://catholicvu.com/1002.htm .  May God bless you with His Presence.  – CatholicView Staff

 
“My dog died and I feel so much pain and
nothing seems to help?.” - Sandra

CatholicView Staff:

My dog died and I feel so much pain and nothing seems to help.   She was the only family I had. -  Sandra

___________________________

Sandra:

I am so sorry that your beloved dog died.  Dogs are God’s special gift to us and when they die it is a very sad loss.  Sadly we must accept that your friend has passed away.  Prayer can help you to heal.

Let me pray with you that God gives you solace during this rough time. 

"Eternal God, I give you all my grief in the loss of my beloved and special dog, and I ask for courage to bear this.  I thank you for giving my dog to me for this was a pet who freely gave me love and joy.  I commit my precious “friend” into Your loving hands.  Give me courage and strength to see how Your love embraces all creatures, and every living thing speaks to me of Your love.  Thank you for the time You gave my dog to be with me.  One day I hope to see my precious friend again if it is your will  Thank you, Father.  Amen."

Sandra, may you find peace during this time.  I know your dog can never be replaced or forgotten, but if you can give another loving home to a homeless and needy pet, it may ease the pain that you are feeling now.  I am praying for you.  – CatholicView Staff

 

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