FATHER MATTHEW KOWALSKI Dear Father Matthew:My name is Martin and I am a 22 year old in the United States Army and a veteran of Operation Iraqi Freedom. In regard to the upcoming election, I have heard that the Catholic Church has said it is a sin to vote for John Kerry because of his stance on abortion. Even though I am totally against the pro-choice stance on abortion, I agree with him on other issues that affect our country. Is it wrong to vote for him? If so, is it wrong to vote for George W. Bush because of his stance on capital punishment? Thank you for your time. A very confused voter. - Martin
There is no official announcement from "the
Catholic Church" about the sinfulness of voting for any particular candidate.
But a number of bishops have expressed concerns about Kerry's record of support for legal
abortion. Issues like abortion and euthanasia are more clear-cut than capital
punishment because in these cases an innocent life is being taken. Church teaching
does allow nations the right to capital punishment, but Pope John Paul II has expressed
the opinion that it would be better for nations not to use this right.
Father Matthew: My father was diagnosed with a debilitating disease and was existing only through the assistance of a respirator. His quality of life was almost completely diminished and there was little hope of recovery. My sister and I made the decision to forego extreme medical intervention and had him removed from the respirator. After 17 hours, my father passed away peacefully and with dignity and honor. My question is: Will God forgive me for making that decision? - Tasha
If your father died within 17 hours of the removal of life-support, that suggests the respirator was keeping him alive. If you had a reasonable belief that your father did not want to be kept alive in this way, there would be no sin in removing the life-support. Of course I cannot know all the factors in this case. But the general principle is that we do not have to make use of extraordinary means to prolong our life, if (and only if) we are in the process of dying naturally. (For example it would be very wrong to remove someone's respirator in a routine operation.) Based on what you say it could be acceptable to have the respirator removed in this case. - Fr Matthew
Father: Two of my friends are in a heated disagreement as to what day is the Sabbath Day of the fourth commandment. One is saying that the Sabbath is clearly the seventh day and it is Saturday. He says we can call Sunday the Lord's day but don't call it the Sabbath. The other friend protests that Sunday is traditionally the Sabbath, and the church fathers (men wiser than us) have pronounced Sunday to be the Day God Commanded be kept Holy. My question, Who is right according to the Bible? And must I keep one or the other to be saved? - Sincerely R. Ems
For the Jews, including Jesus, the Sabbath day was Saturday. The early Christian Church decided to move our holy day of worship to Sunday because it was the day of resurrection. Sunday is our holy day of the week, but the word Sabbath usually refers to Saturday. This is a case where the Church has a belief not recorded directly in the Bible. Every Christian does have an obligation to give thanks to God; this is part of being a disciple. Sunday is the day we set aside to worship. This is the day we honor God. However the question of what observances we need for salvation goes far beyond the matter of Sunday. - Fr Matthew
Father Matthew: Why is it necessary to go to confession to ask a Priest for forgiveness for sins I have committed? Aren't they just people like everyone else? Why can't we talk directly to God to ask his forgiveness? Thank You. - Sandy
Sins must be confessed to the Church, because only the Church has the sacramental power to forgive them. Jesus gave this power to the apostles very clearly. Jesus did not give his disciples the power to forgive themselves directly by praying, which is what you are describing. Fr Matthew
FATHER AMARO SAUMELL Father Amaro: Is it a sin to pray for
the death of a loved one who is stricken with dementia and has lost most of her ability to
retain any memories of her life? Her health is failing fast. She has buried 5
children and with the latest death of an adult child she can't remember most of the rest
of her children. The state she is in is something she has always dreaded. She
devoted most of her later years in the service of the church and now she is even unable to
go to mass. Can I pray for her release from life? – Lori
Dear Lori, Years ago, I remember a
prayer to St. Joseph for a “Peaceful Death.” It wasn’t that we pray for
death, for death itself is a result of the effects of original sin. Your reference to her
as a “loved one” means that you want the best for her and not the most
convenient for you. That could be a real challenge, because it means that you’re
willing to be as uncomfortable as Christ was on the Cross for her benefit. I’ve
always said that I am not afraid of death, just of how it’s going to happen.
Obviously, there’s a little bit of coward in all of us. We often project that on our
loved ones. We “think” they are in pain, when they are not (if they are being
treated properly by a medical team). In this day and age, there is no excuse for someone
to have pain. There are good pain management teams. Your loved one is letting go. You stated that she is failing fast. She has little or no memory. That might even mean that she is leaving this life without the pain of loss of those five children because she simply cannot remember. There is a purging of her emotional pain as the doctors work with her physical pain. In fact, she probably has no memory of what she “dreaded.” She is slipping away through her own abandonment of this life as we all do eventually. The hardship isn’t so much on her any longer. Yet it is difficult for those who love her. It is unfortunate, but we don’t all
come into this life and leave at the same time. I went through a very similar experience
twice in the past three years with three of the closest people in my life. Two of those
people were very young by today’s standards. Cancer was eating them away. It was
difficult to watch. I prayed for their comfort, not for their deaths. I prayed for their
souls so that they may face God in purity. And I prayed for myself that I might learn what
God wanted me to learn through the experience. I had every confidence that God’s
saving love was triumphant in their lives. But I became even more aware that I had to
learn to surrender to the same mourning that the mother of our Lord experienced.
Fortunately, the deaths of my loved ones was natural and not by the hate of others. Always remember, God
doesn’t take us from this life. The whole point of Jesus’ death was that he
saves us from death and brings us to eternal life. Sometimes, the slow passing into death
is our actual purgatory, when we surrender totally to trust that Jesus’
accomplishment is true and powerful. I pray that God will allow this to happen to me in
this life, so I’ll be ready for the next. In your love, allow the same for your loved
one. And don’t forget to ask God to enlighten you with what you are to learn from the
experience of letting her go. There is
nothing sinful in sharing with the Lord what is in our hearts.
Father Amaro: I'm 67, married, and have been reunited with my first girl friend in high school via email. She's now a pudgy grandmother, and there is NO "lust" involved. We both have troubled marriages, and I've been working on mine for years through marriage counselors and psychiatrists - and still am. In the meantime, my old girlfriend and I have been offering each other vital support in feeling loved. Before this, I had been diagnosed with a serious depression, related to my rejection by my wife for the past 20 years, which has disappeared since the email connection. And there is NO alienation of affection with my wife. Can I continue this interaction without committing serious sin? – Alpha Dear Alpha, Often, it is possible to get so caught up with the idea of “lust” as being the only type of infidelity to marriage, when sexuality is only a part of the expression of marriage. Marriage also requires “forsaking all others” so that a married couple may emulate the priesthood of baptism in mirroring the relationship of Christ to His Bride, the Church. We as His Bride look constantly to be forgiven for transgressions. And so, every married couple consciously does the same. You must be bride to the Christ that dwells in your wife and offer forgiveness and she must be bride to the Christ in you. Jesus doesn’t look for another friend when his Bride is not being friend. He is totally devoted to our purification and reaches out in friendship. He doesn’t number the times that we reject Him. He is always there. I suspect that you’ve been married a good 40 years. Obviously, your wife has lived through a great deal with you. You must ask yourself, “Would any others have done the same?” I think you’ll find that your marriage isn’t as troubled as you thought. And, whatever has been troubled can be remedied by your insistence to live and forgive from your heart as Jesus does with us. Jesus was often troubled with his bride. He didn’t feel good about it. There was nothing convenient about his ministry to His Bride. Yet, He acted on his “convictions” and not merely his feelings... until death. Even so, He still waits for us. Your suffering (which means “endurance”) is similar. He does not look to another for consolation, except for the Father and the Holy Spirit. Might I suggest that since that is good enough for your Lord and Savior that it’s good enough for you? God bless, Fr. Amaro
Dear Father Amaro: I attend Mass daily. Today when I went to Mass it was not conducted by a Deacon; it was conducted by a woman. I felt it was not right. Therefore, I did not take communion. I was angry. I don't blame the woman but I still feel it was wrong. What does our church say? – Salena
Dear Salena, Well, let’s get one thing straight... and that’s the language and understanding of what you attended. It certainly wasn’t “Mass.” It was a “Communion Service.” We read in the recently published, Redemptionis Sacramentum.... “154.] As has already been recalled, “the only minister who can confect the Sacrament of the Eucharist in persona Christi is a validly ordained Priest”. [254] Hence the name “minister of the Eucharist” belongs properly to the Priest alone. Moreover, also by reason of their sacred Ordination, the ordinary ministers of Holy Communion are the Bishop, the Priest and the Deacon,[255] to whom it belongs therefore to administer Holy Communion to the lay members of Christ’s faithful during the celebration of Mass. In this way their ministerial office in the Church is fully and accurately brought to light, and the sign value of the Sacrament is made complete.[156.] This function is to be understood strictly according to the name by which it is known, that is to say, that of extraordinary minister of Holy Communion, and not “special minister of Holy Communion” nor “extraordinary minister of the Eucharist” nor “special minister of the Eucharist”, by which names the meaning of this function is unnecessarily and improperly broadened.” Your secondary mistake in refusing to receive Holy Communion was the act against loving neighbor by rejecting not only the ministry that he or she was installed to perform, but also rejecting the person herself because it wasn’t your preference. We say in our Creed that we believe in “one holy catholic and apostolic church.” That means that we believe Jesus as Lord when He said, “Whatever you hold bound on earth shall be bound in heaven.” He also said, “I will be with you until the ends of the earth.” Since the end of the earth has not come, the governing authority of the apostolate still stands. Since it has approved the use of extraordinary ministers of communion, we must presume that the instruction came from the Holy Spirit breathed upon the Apostles and their ministry at that time. If we don’t believe this, we would be congregationalists, whose theology it is that the congregation governs what is taught and practiced. Hope this helps. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Dear Father: Why does the Bible preach against gays and gay rights? Thank you. - Marcus
Dear Marcus, The bible doesn’t really teach any “rights” per se. It teaches us God’s intentions and offers us the opportunity to move into that intention. It also offers us the opportunity to participate in with that intention in certain “calls.” for example, some are called to marriage. Jesus reiterates: [Mat 19:4-6]"Have you not read
that from the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female' and said, 'For this reason
a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall
become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what
God has joined together, no human being must separate." Even a man and a woman answer a call validly only when the intention is to follow the intention of their Creator to become one flesh. The dignity of their union is so profound that new life can be created of that union. Nonetheless, it isn’t merely a “right.” It is a “call.” It cannot be done on “impulse,” but rather, with “intention.” There is a dignity in this. There is no dignity in the “imitation” of married love, which embraces the physical as well as the emotional and spiritual. In the physical, as we know, human sperm enters into the body of the male’s perfect complement in the female and brings about new life. It is productive a well as unitive. In its cheap imitation, human sperm is often deposited into an orifice for human waste or digestive tract or other, which demeans the design of the human body. There is no dignity in that. This is not to say that love cannot exist between two people of the same gender. But real love does no harm. It does not demean the other or exploit. That type of love is called “friendship” and can be pleasing to God. Jonathan and David are a good example. They loved each other, but didn’t cheapen their love by attempting to pervert the intention of God’s design through inappropriate use of their bodies. One might say, “But I was born this way.” Of course, that would mean that God intended that any child be born with a deformity. If that were the case, Jesus would not have spent his time curing the sick and giving sight to the blind, a sign of restoration, would he? No, we all suffer some effect of the distortions brought about by original sin, when imperfection was introduced into humanity. It is never considered a “right” to esteem imperfection or a perversion of the intention. Rather, we work towards the ideal of restoration to God’s intention. This would be true not only of homosexuality, but also of bearing false witness, adultery, stealing, murder, and all the other imperfections with which we find ourselves challenged. If we truly have a right, it is to move deeper into God’s intention and ask for forgiveness when we sincerely repent from the faults with which we participate. Hope this helps. God bless, Fr. Amaro
SEPTEMBER 2004
FATHER MATTHEW KOWALSKI Dear Father Matthew:
Sherri:
Father:
Ruthven:
Father Matthew:
Dear
Richard:
After the rapture, can a person still be saved during the tribulation period if they choose not to get the mark of the beast? - Pablo
Pablo: The answer is: Believe in Jesus now. There won't be any second
chances when everything comes to an end. Be faithful and live as if there are no
tomorrows for tomorrows are not promised to anyone.
Be on guard for no man knows when the end will come. Hope this helps. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: Wanda: Oral sex within marriage is not wrong if the final act is intercourse. But both partners must agree and find this acceptable. - CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff:
Jenny: The main question is why is it necessary for you and your fiancé to share living quarters before marriage? The rule of thumb that applies here is to avoid the occasion of sin. Two people who are in love will have temptations that close proximity will intensify and therefore you might put yourselves in danger of sinning and immorality. You must to speak with your parish priest immediately about this. He will be able to give you the proper guidelines on this important issue. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView:
Ryan: The cornerstone of our Christian faith is our belief in the divinity of Jesus Christ. That is what separates us from other religions and belief systems. But I must also remind you that Jesus was FULLY human as well as FULLY divine. So, when Jesus was mentioning the above quoted verses, he was referring to his own humanity. But these are NOT in conflict with the truth that Jesus is Lord. In the Gospel of John, the first verse of that gospel says it all: “(John 1:1) In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God.” How much clearer can it be made that Jesus, the Word of the Father, is divine. You can continue to see in the Gospel of John that Jesus refers to Himself as divine directly when He uses the term, I AM, which is the Hebrew name of God, I am Who I am (Yahweh) (Exodus 3:13-14) “Then Moses said to God, Indeed when I come to the children of Israel and say to them, “The God of our fathers has sent me to you” and they say to me, “What is His Name?” what shall I say to them?” And God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM.” And He said, “Thus you shall say to the children of Israel, “I AM has sent me to you.”. “(John 8:58) Jesus said to them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I AM.” Then they took stones to throw at Him.” It became quite obvious that Jesus was saying that He is God in this instance and the people got the message because they wanted to stone Him for blasphemy. All throughout the Gospel of John, Jesus Himself refers to Himself as divine. So, in His humanity, Jesus was “lower than the angels” (Hebrews 2:9) and therefore was the Son of Man. In His divinity, Jesus was Son of God (John 1:34). Jesus is equally both human and divine, Son of God and son of man, and as described in John 1:28-34, part of the Godhead Who is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. - CatholicView staff
Catholicview:
Sin is anything
against the Will of God. And here is the Will
of God, “(I John 5:1) Whoever believes that Jesus is the Christ is born of God and
everyone who loves Him who begot also loves Him who is begotten of Him. By this, we know that we love the children of God
when we love God and keep his commandments.” Sin
cannot be simply put down in a list of wrongdoings. Sin
has to do with my relationship with Jesus Christ and His Church, the believers in Jesus
Christ. Sin is a broken relationship between
God and others. If your conscience says
something is wrong, then listen to that voice and see if what you are doing is loving God,
neighbor and yourself. If your conscience
says that something is wrong, don’t do it. Sin
is not based on law, sin is based on my love relationship with God and His creation, which
includes my neighbor and myself. By seeing
sin in terms of broken relationships, then an attitude changes in me. Instead of seeking to do the minimum (the
commandments), I seek to fulfill God’s Will to the maximum. Instead of trying to think in legal terms, I think
in only one way: loving God and neighbor in
all things.
AUGUST 2004
Is it proper for a priest to serve as Power-of-Attorney and Executor for an elderly parishioner who is very close to her family, and then to accept her entire estate for his personal benefit? Thank you for your help. - Alex
Dear Alex, Well, propriety would depend on several factors. If a person is close to her family, surely a family member would have been chosen for the job. Apparently, the person in question did not feel close enough to family members to have one be a Power of Attorney. The priest would have to be a close personal friend. Sometimes, friends are closer to a person than their own family. But to take on that task can be a very difficult one. Every year at the Chrism Mass, the priests renew a vow not to take advantage of their parishioners through their position. On the other hand, does this mean that a priest cannot have personal friends? Of course not. The priest has to search his own conscience as to whether his friendship is indeed a friendship, or if it is a cultural admiration of a parishioner. Then he must examine the actual act of the giver. Is it truly his or her will that he receive something based on a valid relationship? I know that if I were taking pastoral care of a friend and saw their family members there every day taking part in the care of the person, I would probably back away. However, if I never saw a family member on a regular basis, which would be evidence to me that the family member is only a “blood relative” and not “family,” I wouldn’t have any problem accepting a sincere gift from a close friend. But I would have to know in my heart that this was her or his actual act of the will. An individual is free to give whatever he or she wants to whomever he or she wants. Sometimes people see that their own family members are doing well financially and wish to help someone else. Diocesan priests are responsible for their own retirement. It is not like an “order” priest who is taken care of in elderly years by his “order.” Many Catholic faithful know this and try to help by leaving priests the tools and finances that they would need. It is only in recent years that such things as pensions have come into being for secular or Diocesan priests. Sometimes they just leave things to the Church to help out in ministry. There are so many reasons why a person might leave their wealth to the Church or an individual priest. Usually, they are comfortable with doing so because their heirs are not in need, or, their heirs didn’t keep contact with them and offered no relationship. Sometimes their heirs abandoned them to a nursing home. A true, loving family member would want whatever the deceased would want, for that family member would want the deceased’s will to be free and wouldn’t expect entitlement. It is also possible that the priest may merely be greedy and is exploiting a parishioner. God have mercy on his soul if he ever does. That would be a complete betrayal of his office. Hope this helps.
Father Amaro: Did Jesus actually cast out demons or did he cure what today is considered mental illness? Please help. - Charles
Dear Charles, You know something? I just don’t know. I can only speculate on this one. But if I did, I would probably say it’s a combination of the two. After all, the recording of these events is subject to the observer who wrote about them. Some of the descriptions definitely sound like seizures. Others, contained dialogue of the demons. My “impression” (what impresses me) is that Jesus has the power to do both. That is what gives me confidence. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Father Amaro: I was recently told that the Catholic belief in purgatory no longer exists. Can you help me with the correct answer? Thank you. - Tom
Dear Tom, How sad that this happens. I was in a parish once in which an elderly man’s 40 year old son died having a stroke in the shower. When he approached his pastor to have masses said for his son, the pastor asked why. The man voiced his concerns about purgatory. The priest replied, “I never learned anything about purgatory in the seminary. That concept is out dated” or something to that effect. Needless to say, the man went away heartbroken and went through a period of severe depression and loss. Now, if that priest had simply picked up his catechism to see what the Holy Spirit has actually taught through the Apostolate of the Church that Jesus established and promised to protect through His breathing the Holy Spirit upon them, he might have come up with something different. After all, upon doing that, Jesus said, “I will be with you until the ends of the earth.” That time hasn’t come yet. And, Jesus doesn’t lie. So, your answer could have been found in the teaching. Here are some definitions and references from the Catechism for you: PUNISHMENT, ETERNAL: The penalty
for unrepented mortal sin, separating the sinner from communion with God for all eternity;
the condemnation of the unrepentant sinner to hell (1035). Hope this helps, God bless, Fr. Amaro
FATHER MATTHEW KOWALSKI
Dear Father Matthew: My
23 year old daughter and her 27 year old fiance have been denied marriage by my parish
priest because they both have Down Syndrome. They are high functioning and
understand as well as any young couple what marriage is all about and what is expected
from each of them. My question: What is it the Church is afraid will happen if
these two wonderful people marry that will go against the Church's teaching? Thanks
for helping. - Joan
Dear Joan:
Father: I am feeling extremely terrible about an awful sin I committed and I am doing penance for it. I burn myself with hot wax from candles I light when I am alone. How can I know up to what point God has forgiven? How do I know when my penance has been enough? Thank you, Father. - Salvador
Salvador:
Father Kowalski: My partner and I are both practicing Catholics, we find ourselves only able to naturally enjoy full intimacy during my partner's menstrual periods (contraception). The Bible (Leviticus) says that this is a sin, does the Catholic church agree with the Bible or has Jesus' death (Matthew) absolved this? Can you help? - Frank
Frank:
JULY 2004
Dear Father:
Nancy:
Father Kowalski:
Dear Ed:
Father Kowalski:
If God never allowed evil to happen, this would be heaven, not earth. People of strong faith can hold on to it no matter what happens to them. People who are looking for an excuse to abandon their faith can find one anywhere. Any parents who expect children should know that the whole process has many risks, and will demand much giving on their part. Someone not willing to give of themselves should think twice about being a parent. Father Kowalski
The
difficult part of this isn't so much the confession of sins and absolution, but the
reparation. Examine this part of the
Catechism of the Catholic Church: Satisfaction
1460
The penance the confessor imposes must take into account the penitent's personal situation
and must seek his spiritual good. It must correspond as far as possible with the gravity
and nature of the sins committed. It can
consist of prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service of neighbor, voluntary
self-denial, sacrifices, and above all the patient acceptance of the cross we must bear. Such penances help configure us to Christ, who
alone expiated our sins once for all. They
allow us to become co-heirs with the risen Christ, "provided we suffer with
him."[63]
God bless, Fr. Amaro
Dear
Father Amaro: My wife
and I are active Catholics with 3 children. I recently had a vasectomy with full knowledge
that the Church considers a vasectomy a mortal sin, although I disagree with this Church
teaching. I
understand the Church's argument against birth control but in-depth personal examination
of my marital and financial circumstances led me to make a choice that I don't think was
holy, but was the least bad of my available options. I don't know how to sincerely confess
a sin that I am not truly sorry for. Thus, how can I receive genuine forgiveness? From the
Church's view, am I permanently separated from salvation and damned to hell since from the
Church's view, I will die in an unrepentant state? I am very concerned about this. Thanks
for your time. – JL Dear
JL, I'm sorry
that I cannot offer any consolation for the mutilation of your body. The Holy Spirit has made it very clear through the
Apostolate and their successors, whose teaching is protected by the promise of Christ to
be with us until the ends of the earth that, "Except when performed for strictly
therapeutic medical reasons, directly intended amputations, mutilations, sterilizations
performed on innocent persons are against the moral law." (Catechism 2297) The
Church's argument is not against "birth control" in general. It is against "artificial" birth
control, that is, man made. This would cover
anything that is contrary to the way we are created.
I am so sorry that you resorted to such measures when it has been proven
that Natural Family Planning (not the old Rhythm method by which we probably populated the
Church) is so effective in controlling the size of families. Unless you are truly destitute in comparison to
others in the world society (not merely American standards) I am not sure how you
rationalized this action. You seem
to have been able to buy a computer, right? It could be that you are measuring by material
possession as primary over God given life. As
far as the marital part of your consideration, I would challenge you again. You never gave your age. I could sympathize with
you of you already have a large number of children. But
if you have three, there is little to argue for. And, even that would be a pretty futile
attempt given that love of a spouse and love of children are given freely. You also
gave no reasons that would reveal a danger to your life in having a medical procedure such
as this. The Church doesn't make pronouncements of damnation. But you are correct in
stating, "a choice that I don't think was holy..." I'm not sure in this day and
age that the medical procedure can be repaired. And
the fact that you are not repentant of bodily mutilation can be endangering your
salvation. It is a very serious crime against
a loving God who gave you such capability in the way He created you. It seems that you put your finances, convenience,
and comfort of your marital situation before His intention of creating you to a certain
form. I'm not sure what kind of reparation
can be made for such a sin, although I know all things are possible with God. Be
assured of my prayers.
Father: I am a very broken person. I have been in and out of counseling most of my life because I have never healed from the experiences of my abusive mother, which continue to this day. I am 56 years old, cannot consider myself successful in any way and I feel like this abuse has always held me back in life. Can you give me some insight about honoring parents who are very abusive, please? - Cheryl
I'm sure
your pain is very real and you carry legitimate hurts. It would be unhealthy of you to
deny that they are there. And, there is nothing wrong with identifying the abuses you
suffered. But there's much more. "Honoring"
parents does not mean that you bow down to these horrible memories and rationalize them. Honoring parents may even be limited to the one
right thing they did, and that is, giving you life. The
honoring of your parents at this stage would be taking the good that you did receive and
developing it, no matter how small it may be. At 56 years old, don't allow yourself to get caught up in the
blame game. Remember Adam? He blamed Eve.
Remember Eve? She blamed the
serpent. None of them would take any personal
responsibility for their own decisions. You
don't want to fall into that trap. You have
control of your life now. You may
want to re-evaluate how you measure success. Through
your hurt have you learned how to be a kinder person to break the pattern of your mother's
behavior? Then you are successful. Do you lead a moral life? Then you are successful. Do you do your best at
supporting yourself? Then you are successful. I'm sure the list can go on and on. The catch is that we "choose" to believe
in our successes in cooperation with God's grace or we choose to ignore them. Identify
your feelings. But don't act on them. Jesus felt terrified in the Garden of Gethsemene. He cried out, "Let this cup pass from
me." But he acted on his conviction and
not his feelings. He said "Not my will,
but yours..." Have you developed
and chosen to identify the fact that you are loved by God? Suffering may last the rest of your life. It surely did with Jesus. But that didn't overshadow his
"successes" or his love for his neighbor. When
you receive the Blessed Sacrament, you're in very good company. And
remember, if your mother confessed her weaknesses sincerely, she may have already received
forgiveness, but not necessarily gained control over that weakness. Forgiving her, but learning by her errors may be
the deepest acknowledgment of your honoring her. It
will also be the source of your never letting it happen in your generation. Hope
these thoughts help. News! I now have my own domain name. It's
much easier to remember. Click here for http://www.fatheramaro.com/. Come and visit my web
site and sign my guestbook
CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff:Since the body is changing at every moment, which body will be resurrected? Or, to put it another way, how old will I be? If the body is part of the self, then my identity must be constantly changing. Which one will I have eternally? Will I be a toddler, a teenager or a great-grandfather? - Norman
The Pharisees in Jesus' time asked a similar question when they
asked Jesus about which of the seven husbands a dead woman would be married
to. Simple answer: we will be what God wants us to be. Age, size, and
even physical body attributes are not the issue: the issue is how much we have
grown. We will have the body that we were always meant to have. Since there is
NO TIME in heaven, there is NO AGE. And using Jesus as a guide, when He was
resurrected, at first, his disciples didn't recognize him, but nonetheless, the wounds
that his physical body suffered were still there. That means that we will enter
heaven with a body that we will not recognize except for the wounds that we suffered both
physcially and spiritually. Those wounds would be healed and free from pain.
But the wounds will remind us of where we came from and how much God loves us.
JUNE 2004
Father Amaro Saumell Father Amaro: Should we use the communion rail to judge others because of their political views? For an example: Shouldn’t a candidate be the individual’s own choice as to whether he is right with God? My question is should we deny a Catholic communion if that person chooses to vote for someone not in accordance with the church? - Janice
Dear Janice, Communion rail? Be
careful. That dates you! Seriously, ask
yourself this question. What is the meaning of the reception of Holy Communion? It means that we are receiving Jesus as our Lord. To receive Jesus as Lord means receiving his whole
being, his whole work, and his whole intention. To contradict that in any way is to
blaspheme the Blessed Sacrament and the sacrifice it makes present for our life. Jesus seems to have
this obsession with the importance of life, doesn’t he? You see, life and living are
two different things. God is the author of life. The only reason to take a life is to
protect the innocent. So, whether it is life in an embryo, a fetus, a born person in any
age group, life is important to God. How life
is lived and the circumstances in which it is lived are called “issues.” Life is
not an issue. Matthew 16:18 tells
“And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church, and
the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it.
I will give you the keys to the kingdom of heaven. Whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in
heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven." In John 20:22 it
says “And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, "Receive
the holy Spirit. And in John 20:23, “Whose sins you forgive are forgiven them, and
whose sins you retain are retained." It seems that Jesus
entrusted His authority to Peter and the Twelve. This is His intention. So, to receive
Holy Communion means that we must be in communion with the authority he left the Apostolic
ministry. For it is not merely human beings who are teaching us, but God Himself in the
Holy Spirit that was breathed upon them and their success. When one falls from
the faith, Jesus instructs us: [Mat 18:16] If he does not listen, take one or two others
along with you, so that 'every fact may be established on the testimony of two or three
witnesses.' [Mat 18:17] If he refuses to listen to them, tell the church. If he refuses to
listen even to the church, then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector. [Mat
18:18] Amen, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and
whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. St. Paul tells us:
(1 Cor10:21) You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and also the cup of demons. You cannot
partake of the table of the Lord and of the table of demons. And [1 Cor11:28] A person should examine himself,
and so eat the bread and drink the cup. (1 Cor 11:29) “For anyone who eats and drinks
without discerning the body, eats and drinks judgment on himself.” So, to answer your
question, “yes.” For anyone to
openly deny the realities of the teaching and accomplishment of God is not fit to receive
the Most Precious Body and Blood of the Lord. To encourage one to do so or to allow it
shows our lack of charity on that person as he “brings judgment upon himself.” A political view is
an informed opinion and conclusion. If one is
to put this opinion before the truths and will of God, he or she is not in
“communion” with the Lord and should be denied, for he or she has departed from
the faith. God does not care about separation
of church and state. In other words, a
person’s integrity is 24 hours a day. It
doesn’t turn on and off because of a political view. Now it is difficult in this world to make choices through politics. We are told that we must do our civic duty. Even by the Holy Father. This means that we must use our skill in choosing of the lesser evils that are presented to us. In this choice, we choose to protect the most innocent, as Jesus would have us. For example, we are generally against the death penalty. However, the person who commits heinous crimes knew the penalty before he committed it. The unborn child has committed no crime and receives the same sentence. So, in our choice, we opt to protect the innocent first. When I vote, I must vote for the one that will protect the most innocent. How could I possibly stand before the Lord after putting my own “issues” that can be dealt with tomorrow before a life that would be killed today? My issues are mere inconveniences. Death is death. That contradicts the “way the truth, and the life, Who is the one I call Lord. I would never endanger my salvation over a mere issue by concerning myself with an issue over the essence of being, a life. If I ever do, deny me the Blessed Sacrament too and pray for God’s mercy upon my soul through conversion to God’s ways. Hope this helps. God bless. - Fr. Amaro
Father Amaro: Where in the Bible does God ask us "Who did you bring with you?" when we die and have to account for our witnessing to others? - Gracie
Dear Gracie: Unless I overlooked
something, there is no place in the bible that makes any such statement. As a matter of
fact, Jesus, through the parable of the seed tells us that we only take God’s word as
the seed and spread it. Looking to make
points and reward ourselves by a body count reveals a grave lack of humility. We are to evangelize. But it’s God’s
Spirit that converts. Those to whom we
witness make the choice to embrace or reject. When I was in high
school, I was in a play. I remember being
upset about something. I had been raised
never to use the name of the Lord in vain. But
I was going to make an impression! I said in
my frustration, “God Almighty!” There
was a girl at the piano in the orchestra pit named Melody Hoefer who very lovingly looked
up at me and said, “Oh! Don’t say it like that.
He’s my friend.” It took about ten years for that to sink in. Fortunately for me, I was able to locate her in the Carolinas and tell her years later what that meant. But that may have never happened. But she wasn’t looking for reward either. She was humble. Little did either of us know that I would eventually not only know God as a friend, but that I would some day be granted the faculties to consecrate bread and wine into the Body and Blood of His Son in the presence of the everlasting covenant. Hope this helps. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Father Amaro: At communion, why does the priest take the Body and Blood for himself first? - Dale
Dear Dale, When I was a little
boy, I’d ask questions of priests. I
always got, “It’s a mystery. Accept it on faith.” That often translated into “I really
don’t know, but I’m not going to let you know that.” I became so frustrated that I eventually left the
Church for a spell. In order to avoid such frustration on your part, I will just be honest and say, “Duh! I really don’t know!” However, I won’t end it there. I’ll give you a speculative answer. When I receive the Blessed Sacrament first, it calls to mind that the last shall be first and the first shall be last. It is a spiritual disposition and not to be taken literally. In other words, don’t be sitting in the last pew! It reminds me that I am a servant of God and His baptized. Hope this helps. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Father Matthew Kowalski Hello
Father,
Dear
Alex:
Dear Father:
Patrick:
Father Matthew:
Lauren:
MAY 2004
Father Amaro Saumell Father Amaro: I'm a married lesbian. I have been
married for seventeen years, and have seven children. I joined the church in 1992, and
left it shortly afterwards. For various reasons and none of them good ones. Anyway, my
husband knew I was a lesbian shortly after we met, but just recently I was told that being
a lesbian, that I should have never married and should have lived life as a single person.
Is this true? – Nora
Dear Nora, This is a
very subjective question because some people find it possible to live the conjugal married life even though they have a difficulty with a sexual orientation. A desire is just that... a desire. People who live marriage might be tempted to look
the wrong way, but they still have the strength to avoid that temptation. If your husband was trusting enough when the two
of you were married, you must have shown him that you had enough integrity to fulfill your
marriage vows. If this is the case, you must
be continually honest with him about your feelings and try to accept his compassion for
your struggle. Obviously with seven children,
there was expression of conjugal love in your marriage. You might find it helpful to go to
a qualified therapist to help you deal with the struggle too. A good therapist never tells you what to do. He or
she assists you in finding your strengths and putting them into practice. The decisions you make are totally your own. A therapist or "friend" that tells you
what to do or what you should or shouldn't have done is doing you no favors. This type of
"advice" throws up all sorts of red flags to me.
Someone who is really interested in your best interests tells you nothing. He or she only commits to walk by you on your
journey. To be fair, I'll only presume
that this "friend" was voicing an opinion and not an instruction. I'm so pleased that you realize
that you describe your reasons for leaving the church as "none of them good." That seems to express a desire to return to what
you know in your heart is correct. It means
that you're rising above your mere feelings and using the intellect that God gave you to
share in His nature. Acting on the gifts of
the Holy Spirit, which drive us over and above mere feelings through actual decision
making brings the human person to the stature that God intends for us. Obviously your doing something that you've
probably told those seven children a multitude of times and that is "using your
head." If you've lived a good marriage
despite your human weakness, you've already proven your strength in the Holy Spirit. This
can only deepen through participation with the other Sacraments. Hope this helps. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Father Amaro: I
have a friend who is converting to Catholicism. She wants me to be the godfather of
her unbaptized daughter but she has heard rumblings that you can't be a godfather to a
young person unless you are married, that means the male AND female would become the
godmother and godfather. I am single but want dearly to shape the spiritual life of
this child. Am I out of luck due to the fact that I am unmarried? Thanks,
Father. Eric
Dear Eric, If one had to be married to be a God-parent, then I've done something terribly wrong. I have several God-children. Of course, I have not taken that responsibility since ordination because it is not appropriate. The requirements of God-parenting are that both must be baptized. At least one of the Catholic parties must be fully initiated into the faith through the reception of Baptism, Eucharist, and Confirmation and actually be practicing the faith. That means that if the Catholic party is married, he or she must be married as a witness to his or her own baptism by being married in the Church. In present times, this is usually proven through the witness of a pastor, priest, or parish administrator as to attendance and participation with the parish community. No longer is God-parenting taking on the role of merely a "cultural honor." The secondary party, if not Catholic, must fully understand that he or she might be compromising his or her own particular faith by promising to support the child's Catholic faith. There is NO requirement that the two must be married to each other. God bless, Fr. Amaro
Father
Amaro: Can
a person vote for a man running for President, knowing he is for abortion? Will one have
to answer to God for this? I know in my heart it's wrong. - Andrew
Dear
Andrew, Well, first of all, we know that it is possible for both candidates to be
pro-choice to some degree. Or, one party
might proclaim to be pro-life, but be for the death penalty. One must use one's conscience very wisely. Wisdom
is the first and foremost gift of the Holy Spirit and mother of all the other gifts. Always remember that the candidate you vote for
must do the least damage to life. Even though
we are against the death penalty, we know that a person who commits a crime warranting it
has made a choice to take the chance. An
innocent unborn child does not have that choice. Our
Christian duty is to put the most innocent first under the protection of our actions. Jesus
Christ the King, as eternal Word of God, embraced our mortal life and it’s
living to bring it into his own Divine relationship with the Father eternally in the
Holy Spirit. He taught us how to deal with issues of living. But we had to have life
first. As we live it, we learn to love our neighbor, which is the second part of the
Golden Rule. Accordingly,
when we participate in government as we should, we do so on the premise that government is
made to keep living organized and serve the needs of the people. Our government was initiated to protect the right
to life! However, we have to assure through
our participation that the government is there for the protection of all life so it can
live. In this country, we have the privilege
and duty to participate in defining government through voting. It
is imperative as representatives of Jesus that we also die to self and our mere issues to
protect life that won't even be allowed to exist to have issues as a foundation. This refers to the unborn as well as the
potentially euthanized or executed because of their "burdensome" status. Accordingly, we should always use our power in
government, our vote, to protect life first...as much as possible. We can deal with our mere issues, inconveniences,
or hardships of living later in the day or tomorrow. After all, we have life. We have tomorrow.
We're allowed to "live" it. (Isn't it convenient that those who
are alive can legislate whether the weak can have life? Followers of Our Lord seek to
serve the weak.) But the lives lost now cannot be replaced. Our responsibility is to first
preserve life as God has created it, even in its mortality, and then serve its needs, its
issues, it’s living conditions. We can't
love our neighbor if we're allowing our neighbor to be slaughtered or if we become part of
the process of slaughter by commission or omission of opportunity which encourages or
enforces its destruction. The unborn, the
sick, the death row inmates, and the elderly are our neighbors. They cry out for the
Christ in us. God intends for them to live out their mortal journey to find Him. Our society has given permission for answers like "I don't feel that way" as a way to side step truth and rationalize our own agendas for living as more important than life itself. God doesn't rationalize agendas. He is a God of truth. We are made in His image and likeness to be co-creators, not destroyers. A blind person can rationalize that the sky is green. But truth is truth. Jesus is the truth, the way and the life. Those who would ignore truth of life as a fundamental requirement before living need to re-examine and find His Way. God's agenda is salvation. If we want that salvation, we cannot side step His values for our own. Life is the highest value. As
a person baptized into Christ as a representative of the Church, I can only give witness
to the Gospel. That is that life is God's first priority for those who really love
Him and are in communion with His nature to give it. Life is the ultimate value.
Let's not reduce God's gift of life to a mere issue. Our eternal life depends
on what we do in our mortal life. Out eternal King is Jesus, who cam to give us life
and give it more abundantly. So, the final moral question is: Can we endure our
hardships, our inconveniences, our issues in the meantime while we set a priority to
protect life? - God bless, Fr Amaro
Father
Matthew KowalskiFather Kowalski: Two and a half years ago, my mom
developed a brain aneurysm that has ruptured and she has been comatose since. She used to sometimes communicate with us by
blinking her eyes as she is blind or she would squeeze our hands on command. She recently had a bad fever of 106 and has not
done much since. The hospice is encouraging
us to stop the tube feeding to let her go and we are having a rough time making this
decision and wonder if this isd accepted by God? I
need guidance. Thanks. - Kelly
Kelly: It sounds like you are living through a very difficult situation that must be heart-wrenching. The Church teaches that extraordinary means need not be used to keep someone alive. Tube feeding is generally considered an ordinary part of medical care. Tube feeding can be justifiably stopped when it is clear that the person is actually dying. In that case the feeding is accomplishing nothing and so can be removed. But it would be a terrible thing to cause someone's death by withholding food from them. The real harm done is not to the sick person; if they have suffered much they might even be hoping for death to release them. No, the worst thing would be for you or anyone else to know they decided to let someone die. Trust in God and know that people who cling to life are doing so for a reason. - Fr. Matthew
Dear Father, I am confused about the teaching on contraception. If a couple were to marry but not be able to provide a suitable financial environment to bring children into but still have the WILL to have children in the future, is it acceptable to use artificial contraception? I have been told it is up to our conscience whether we see fit to use it appropriately. I know NFP is meant to be very good but there is still a chance of becoming pregnant. Please clarify this. Thank you. - Jennifer
Dear Jennifer: It would not be correct to say a decision like this is based ONLY on a person's conscience. The devil is in the details, as they say. Perhaps people who cannot afford children should delay their marriage. Artificial contraception has a failure rate similar to NFP. Things that work in a labratory don't always work in real life. If a man and woman are certain they want to be married and someday have children, they must accept the POSSIBILITY of children from the very start. Life is full of surprises. Contraception fails at a surprisingly high rate because it tries to treat people as if they were animals. We are not just animals, and family planning can only succeed if it takes into account the whole person; spirit, soul and body. Do not gamble your future happiness on some pills or "protection". There's too much to lose. - Fr. Matthew
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