 FATHER KEVIN BATES, SM
_________________________ Dear Mohinder: Thank you for your letter. It is only love that changes lives and hearts and draws us closer to God and your love for your fiancée sounds as though it has been a special gift for her. Regarding God's forgiveness, that is without question. God forgives completely, it's the only way He knows. It's not your job to fix up her past. No one can do that, as what's done is done and best left to God's love and mercy. All we can do is to keep loving one another now, and forgiving each other when the need arises. Every good wish to you both. - Father Kevin Father Kevin ___________________________ Dear Deborah: Life is too short to weigh ourselves down with such issues really. People should be free to receive the Eucharist in whatever way is right for them. I would never dictate to people how whether they should stand, sit, bow or whatever. The Church provides a range of appropriate ways to receive the Eucharist and so long as we are generally in line with one or other of these, then no one else should be able to tell us what to do, regardless of the custom of the local church. What matters is our encounter with Jesus in the Eucharist and our gestures and postures are of secondary importance. Good wishes to you. – Father Kevin “I had a
miscarriage despite my loving care and a Father Kevin: ______________________________ Dear Michele: What a trauma you have been through and my thoughts and prayers come to you with this little reply. You did your best and had to accept the directions of the medical staff, in order for you to survive. Your longing and purpose was to have your baby well and healthy and that became impossible and therein is a great grief for you. Please don't torture yourself with worries and I'd encourage you to rest in the knowledge that you did your very best. If it is helpful, you might seek out a person with the necessary medical expertise and have them explain why it all had to happen that way. Every blessing and please God you can find your peace now. - Father Kevin
Father Bill: _________________________________ First of all, may I
express my deepest sympathy to you, to your friend and his family, and to everyone else
who must be suffering deeply in the face of such a terrible, senseless tragedy. In my
almost 68 years of life, I have never experienced anything like what you are going
through, so I won’t pretend to know how you feel. I can only imagine. I can also understand why you are wondering where God was as those thugs unleashed their horrible fury. For a person of faith, it is a question that comes from the heart. Our preferred image of God as a benign, caring, loving presence in our lives is severely challenged in the face of personal tragedy. We want to believe that God cares in the same way that we care, so when it appears otherwise, we begin to have some serious doubts and some real questions about who’s in charge. Your question, “Where was God when this happened?” reminds me so much of Jesus’ own words uttered—maybe even screamed—as, hanging on the cross, he endured the torture of the thugs who delighted in his agony: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me!” Clearly, even for his own Son, God’s answer in moments of human tragedy seems to be silence. Inevitably, this delights the atheist and perplexes the believer. How often does it happen that we long for God to swoop down like Superman, Spiderman or Batman to rescue us from the clutches of evil? The fiction always seems to end the way we want it. The reality often leaves so much to be desired in a God who seems so often to abandon us just when we need him most. I don’t know the answer, Johnathan. All I can say is, if Jesus asked the same question as you are asking, then it must be a question that comes from the depths of our humanity. It expresses the frustration we feel when it appears that evil triumphs over good. There are a couple of things that I attempt to keep in mind as I try to make sense of human tragedies. One, of course, is Jesus’ words from the cross that I have already mentioned. Another is my own simplistic phrase, “God is God, and I am not.” It helps me, but I don’t know if it will help you. Finally, I have come to realize that God is as likely to be found in the mess as in the neat and tidy. It usually takes longer to find God in the mess, but when I do find him there, his appearance tends to be more intense and personal than I might ever have imagined. May I be so presumptive as to suggest where you might be most likely to find God in this terrible tragedy, Johnathan? Pray for the thugs. - Father Bill
Father: I need help. A
teen came to me and said she went to confession and confessed that she had sex with
her boyfriend and the priest told her parents. Can he do that? I thought the
Sacrament of Confession was confidential between you and God. She is hurt, confused, and wants to leave the
church and defiantly does not want to ever go to confession again. I need guidance
and prayers. Natalie _______________________________ Dear Natalie, For us priests, the “seal of the confessional” is one of our most sacred obligations. What it means is that we can never tell anyone—no matter who, no matter what—anything that is told to us in the Sacrament of Penance. If a priest is found to have violated this trust, he will be suspended from his priestly ministry. If the teen you speak of has reasonable suspicion and reasonable proof that the priest to whom she confessed her sins did, in fact, tell her parents, then she should immediately report this to her bishop. It would be the right thing to do, and I would hope that she would do so, rather than leave the Church because of this. If she is reluctant to contact the bishop, then I would suggest that she contact the “Vicar for Priests” in her diocese. His name should be readily available on the diocesan website. For the sake of both parties involved, Church representatives have an obligation to investigate such accusations with the utmost discretion. This teen need not be afraid that her name and her situation would be made public in any way. The only obligation on her part is that she be very certain that her parents learned of her fornication from the priest to whom she confessed this sin, and not from some other source. After all, his reputation and the future of his priestly ministry are at stake. I will pray that God will help everyone involved in this to do what is right. I trust readers of this column will do the same.
Dear Father Bill: I don't know if this question is appropriate for this website but I have prayed about this for so long and need some guidance. I married at the age of 21. After 14 years, the marriage ended. I did not seek an annulment of this marriage as it was not my intent to get involved in another relationship anytime soon thereafter. Although after 3 years, I did meet someone and after 2 years we did marry. I am sad to say that I did not complete my annulment papers and we married in the Presbyterian Church. After a few years of marriage I did talk to a priest about obtaining an annulment and am happy (but not proud of myself for how I did things) to say that it was granted. My husband, on the other hand, after so many years of promising me that he would complete his papers, has not and it does not look like he will, although he promises me that he intends to do this. It is my sincerest intent to get married in the Catholic Church. It saddens me that my husband has time for everything else in his life except this even though he knows, after many talks, how important this is to me. I still attend church with my youngest daughter but do not receive any sacraments. I know that I have made mistakes. While I love my husband, I feel great guilt over what I feel is offensive to my faith and God. There is a part of me that would like to end this marriage and have it annulled as well and start over in my faith. There is another part that says that another divorce and annulment would be more offensive. Father. any guidance that you could offer me would be greatly appreciated. Sincerely - Bernadette ______________________________ Dear Bernadette, First of all, let me assure you that your question is very appropriate. Every Catholic should feel free to seek information and advice about their faith lives. Thank you for asking! As a pastor, I would just like to commend you for doing so many things right in the face of some challenging circumstances. It seems to me that you have done your part. You have done everything in your power to have your marriage blessed (“convalidated” is the churchy term). You have continued to practice your faith, even though you may not receive the sacraments. I truly admire you and others like you who don’t give up on your faith or yourselves even when your relationship with the Church is somewhat problematic. Do you have any idea why your husband is reluctant to complete his papers? Is it a matter of money? Time? Principle? Is he Catholic? Does he have questions about the annulment process that haven’t been answered? Have you discussed your situation with your pastor or someone in your parish who deals with annulments? It just seems to me that there must be someone who could help walk your husband through this process, if he is at all willing to give it a try. If he’s being passive-aggressive and has no real intention of proceeding, he should just level with you, so you know where he stands. That leads me to the next point. You mention that you love your husband, but still you wonder if you should end this marriage, have it annulled and then start over. Is it a good marriage, Bernadette? Other than your husband’s lack of action on completing his annulment papers, is it a good marriage? Do you feel, deep in your heart, that God has blessed you with a good husband? I’m pushing this point because I am reluctant to recommend that someone end a good marriage just because it doesn’t conform to the Church’s rules. If a marriage is a good marriage, I would celebrate that as a blessing. Then I would continue to try to make every reasonable effort to make it even better by having the marriage convalidated. Don’t nag you husband about it, but do pray for him and for your marriage. Be patient. God knows you’ve done what you can. Trust him.- Father Bill
__________________________ Damian: Congratulations on being a true artist.
The human family has much to be grateful for in the genius of those who have the
gifts of language, imagination, movement and organization to put on theatrical
productions. The second thing that comes to mind is how
much the Church was a part of the early development in Western Civilization of the
dramatic arts. Not only is the bible an eternal source of dramatic inspiration, but
it was often in church buildings that sacred dramas were acted out in order to convey the
divine truths to a largely illiterate populace. About your questions. Ash Wednesday
and Holy Saturday have their own sacred character. Ash Wednesday has always been the
marker of the start of Lent. The meaning of Ash Wednesday comes from the meaning of
Lent. In many of the Latin countries, the time leading up to the threshold of Lent
was for ribaldry and excesses of the appetites (i.e., song and dance, and banquets)
because Lent was observed with fasting (one complete meal a day).
"Carnevale", a farewell to meat! It would be correct to say that no
matter what sort of celebrations led up to Lent, Ash Wednesday itself was marked with
sober reflection on the human condition, the need for forgiveness, and the process of
conversion. That is what the ashes placed on the forehead would signify. Canon
1251 calls for fast and abstinence on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday. So, I think it
would be fair to say that there is no prohibition to shows on Ash Wednesday, with the
following considerations. The shows should not be so out of character with the
sobriety of Lent that they are distractions from the spirit of receiving blessed ashes on
the forehead. The touring company should not be so exhausted by their work that the
penance of fasting and abstinence would not likely be observed. There are no
specific prohibitions for Holy Saturday, but the Constitution on the Sacred Liturgy
(Vatican II, #109) does recommend that the fast and abstinence of Good Friday be continued
through to the Easter Vigil, i.e., the evening of Holy Saturday. The same
comments I just made for Ash Wednesday would also apply in trying to maintain a proper
decorum for the events being commemorated on Good Friday and Holy Saturday. A final note, the penance associated with
Lent, fasting and abstinence, are always in the context of what is possible. When
keeping these penances is impossible, the Church wisely recommends that we substitute
works of charity and piety. Respectfully,
CatholicView Staff: _______________________ Christina: Within the narrow confines of a sacramental confession, anything said within the sacrament of Penance must be kept secret by the priest. Confession is a sacrament and for anything to be considered “privileged communication protected by civil law,” there must be a formal ritual that begins a privileged communication confession. The priest is obligated to keep all formal confessional conversations secret. But the penitent is not under the same constrictions. The penitent can say anything they want about what they said in confession since the obligation of privileged communication is only upon the priest/confessor. For the Church, that is the moral thing to do. If someone should say something outside the formal limitations of the sacrament of Penance, then the priest is usually (in most states of the USA and in other countries) a “mandated reporter” and must report these kinds of things to law enforcement. If the child mentions such abuse to the priest outside of formal confession, then it is reported. Remember, privileged communication is only recognized by civil law only within the confines of a ritual sacrament called confession. Meanwhile, since you know of the abuse, YOU ARE REQUIRED to report. If this child has said something to you, you are required to speak to law enforcement. As a priest, I ONLY have privileged communication when a person begins our conversation when he/she says, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been so long since my last confession.” If a person does not start their conversation with me in this fashion, they do not enjoy privileged communication in any circumstance. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _____________________________ Yiannis: Philokalia is a series of mystic and spiritual writings of Orthodox authors that defines the Eastern Orthodox spirituality. There is nothing wrong in reading these writings as the Eastern Orthodox community approves them. Since the writings are Jesus-centered, they should bring to you to a deeper understanding of the divinity of Christ. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Louise: You can have your new ring blessed by a priest or deacon. That would certainly make the ring a life-long symbol of your marital love. I must say, however, whether the new ring is blessed or not, the ring does not have a bearing on a successful marriage. The people within the marriage are the responsible parties in ensuring that their marriage grows and matures into what God has called them to be. A good marriage has nothing to do with a material object such as a ring. A good marriage comes from the heart. – CatholicView Staff
___________________________ Aislinn: If your fiancé is Catholic, you do not have to become Catholic to have your marriage blessed in the Church. See your priest for details. If you sincerely want to become a member of the Catholic Church, you can be baptized but you must participate in the RCIA program (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults). This is a process designed for those who want to become members. It is also a time of instruction and bonding with the community, culminating in receiving the sacraments of initiation and full membership in the Church. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: __________________________ Dear Fred: There is no new doctrine concerning the use of God’s Name as seen in the Old Testament. “Yahweh” is the Hebrew acronym meaning, “I am Who I am.” In other words, God doesn’t have a name since He cannot be contained or controlled by a name (see Exodus Chapter 3, Verse 14). But it is a formal “Name” of God within the Hebrew Scriptures. The Church has always avoided using “Yahweh” in respect for the Name and in respect for the Jewish people who dare not pronounce the Name. The Jerusalem Bible began using the term, Yahweh, in its English and French translations to show the difference in the author’s use of the different titles of God. In respect, I do not utter the Old Testament Name in respect for God and the Jewish people. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: __________________________ Dear Amy: You are correct in saying it is time to move on. The husband whom you loved is gone and you are free to marry if you choose. This is not wrong or sinful. Your brother-in-law and other family members may feel you are dishonoring your husband’s memory. This is not true. Perhaps you could talk honestly with them, letting them know how much you loved your husband, but now that he is gone, you are alone. Hopefully they will see that you are trying to renew your life; filling in the void left by your beloved spouse. God wants you to be happy. Go in peace. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ____________________________ Sarah: I do not know the circumstances of
the marriage of your fiancé. If he was
married in the Catholic Church, he will need an annulment before going forward on his
church wedding to you. If he was not married
in the Church, he will need a Lack of Form dispensation, which is much simpler. Please talk to your parish priest about this. CatholicView Staff: What will happen to us who want to believe,
but cannot? – Don ________________________ Don: If you want to believe, you must pray and ask God to touch your heart. Take the first step and start attending Church. Read the bible. Continue to pray constantly. I believe you are searching, so I would suggest you talk this out with a priest or minister. You have eternal life to gain. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________ Kareemo: Congratulations on your planned marriage in the Philippines next year. Since you are both married by civil law and are living together, you cannot receive communion until your marriage is solemnized in the Church. - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _______________________ Charlie: The Church has recognized that any visions of the Blessed Virgin Mary are in the realm of “private revelations.” So, in other words, such visions can be accepted or not accepted by a believer unless otherwise warned by the Congregation of the Doctrine of the Faith (Vatican City). But according to the many mystics that have lived in the past, “saints” have visited others on earth. One saint that comes to mind is Padre Pio. He has been known to appear to those in grave illness. Nonetheless, any visions such as the saints or Jesus Himself are in the realm of private revelation. They are not necessary for salvation. My faith in Jesus Christ is all that is required for salvation. CatholicView Staff: ____________________________ Gregory: Your parents were misinformed. You were given Extreme Unction as a baby (a sacrament also known as the Anointing of the Sick) because you were possibly dying. This hasn’t been true for some time now. You are entitled to the sacraments of the Church the same as your siblings. But first, you must talk to your parish priest and set the records straight. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _________________________ Mike: I am happy to hear that you have served the Lord in these ministries. Now, it is time to come back to your “spiritual home.” The process is simple. Please talk to your parish priest about your situation and the process in being accepted into full communion with the Catholic Church. I am excited to hear that you will be once again a full-member of the Catholic Church. I hope and pray that you will use your ministerial gifts for the Church! - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _____________________ Matthew: Since there was no expectation from you legally concerning your overseas journey, there is nothing to stop you from resigning your position with that company to join another. Hopefully in the future, you will be more honest in all your dealings with employers. After twenty years, there isn’t much you can do and the company did not ask from you any restitution for the overseas seminar. Be at peace. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Jozef: I am so happy that you are returning to the Catholic Church. In order to do this, you must go and talk to your parish priest. Since you have had the Sacraments of baptism, confirmation, and first communion, you will need to be re-affirmed as a member in full standing in the Church. Talk to your parish priest who will determine what has to be done. You will also be asked to go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation (confession). Welcome back. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _________________________ Dear Ann: You do not say if the divorce is final or not. Until this man gets an annulment, he is still considered married in the eyes of the Church if he is Catholic. You do not say whether or not you are married, never married or divorced. CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Dear Russ: Do not distress yourself about this. God reads the heart. You are not held responsible for dreams. A dream is not an action. It is conscious actions that we worry about. If you will feel better, pray and ask God for forgiveness. He is all loving and He knows you well. Continue to move on, serving the Lord. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: I was married to my first husband outside the church in a civil ceremony. We have been divorced for the past 2 years. I've recently become engaged to another Catholic and we wish to marry in the Church. Do I need an annulment? Thanks, LC ____________________ LC: Yes, you can marry in the Church. You will need a Lack of Form dispensation that can be had from your local parish priest. Congratulations on your upcoming marriage! – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ______________________________ Maribeth: Good question! Some believe it is because our relatives in heaven are not limited by time and can see the blessings ahead or the final outcome of earthly situations. Someday we will have the answer to that. Right now, we have to rely on God’s wisdom and judgment to make all things right. We are limited here by our humanity; relatives in heaven are not. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _____________________________ Dear Jackie: Of course you can attend your grandchild’s
baptism. But, you will have to refrain from
accepting communion. For Catholics, the Vatican counts as valid
only Catholic Eucharist--bread and wine that have been consecrated by a priest as part of
a Catholic Mass. For more
information, check with your parish priest. –
CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________ Dear Jane: Congratulations and thank you for your question. A Catholic and non-Catholic can have their marriage blessed in the Catholic Church. Your husband does not have to become Catholic in order to do so. See your priest for more information on this. God bless you. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Dear Sheila: I am so sorry that your father cannot see the pain he is causing you and your family. Why does your mother allow this to happen? And have you talked to her about this? The bible tells us to honor our fathers and our
mothers in the Ten Commandments. In your case it is difficult to do this. But you did the right thing and God is very
pleased and will bless you greatly for adhering to God’s commandment. You say
that your dad has been ill. Because of his
illness, if you could try to do the things he really needs and avoid any confrontation
that may cause an upheaval in your family, you will have to ignore his criticism. Sometimes when people are ill, it makes them
feel powerful to tear others down. If you
can, ignore his atrocious behavior and try to avoid spending extra time that may cause you
grief. If he truly needs you, ignore his
awful behavior and try to help him for he will always be your father. Even now you are being blessed for the respect you
have given your father although he might not deserve it. Hope
this helps. – CatholicView
Staff CatholicView Staff: Richard: I am sorry that you indulge in pornography. I thank God that your conscience is telling you to avoid this sin. Having evil thoughts can lead you into action. I would advise that when you are inclined to do this that you replace these evil desires with a simple prayer asking God to strengthen and keep you from sin. The repetition of prayer makes you stronger because you, through prayer, are calling on the highest power available to man; Almighty God. You will overcome this addiction if you continue to pray. Pray this simple prayer or one of
your own each time you are tempted by Satan: Please go and see your priest. He will help you to understand what God expects from all of us. Remember God loves you and wants you to have peace in your life - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Yiannis: Philokalia is a series of mystic and spiritual writings of Orthodox authors that defines the Eastern Orthodox spirituality. There is nothing wrong in reading these writings as they are approved by the Eastern Orthodox community. Since the writings are Jesus-centered, they should bring to you to a deeper understanding of the divinity of Christ. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ______________________ Louise: You can have your new ring blessed by a priest or deacon. That would certainly make the ring a life-long symbol of your marital love. I must say, however, whether the new ring is blessed or not, the ring does not have a bearing on a successful marriage. The people within the marriage are the responsible parties in ensuring that their marriage grows and matures into what God has called them to be. A good marriage has nothing to do with a material object such as a ring. A good marriage comes from the heart. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff ________________________________ Aislinn: Thank you for writing to CatholicView. To be clear, you are saying that you were never baptized or affiliated with any church? If you sincerely want to accept the Lord as your Savior, you can certainly be baptized in the Catholic Church. And yes, it is a requirement that you participate in the RCIA program (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults). It is a process designed for adults to enter the Catholic Church and a time of instruction and bonding with the community. It culminating in receiving the sacraments of initiation and full membership in the Church. Welcome to our Church. – CatholicView Staff
__________________________ Dear Fred: There is no new doctrine concerning the use of God’s Name as seen in the Old Testament. “Yahweh” is the Hebrew acronym meaning, “I am who I am.” In other words, God doesn’t have a name since He cannot be contained or controlled by a name (see Exodus Chapter 3, Verse 14). But it is a formal “Name” of God within the Hebrew scriptures. The Church has always avoided using “Yahweh” in respect for the Name and in respect for the Jewish people who dare not pronounce the Name. The Jerusalem Bible began using the term, Yahweh, in its English and French translations to show the difference in the author’s use of the different titles of God. In respect, I do not utter the Old Testament Name in respect for God and the Jewish people. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Dear Amy: You are correct in saying it is time to move on. The husband whom you loved is gone and you are free to marry if you choose. This is not wrong or sinful. Your brother-in-law and other family members may feel you are dishonoring your husband’s memory. This is not true. Perhaps you could talk honestly with them, letting them know how much you loved your husband, but now that he is gone, you are alone. Hopefully they will see that you are trying to renew your life; filling in the void left by your beloved spouse. God wants you to be happy. Go in peace. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _____________________________ Sarah: In your letter you did not make clear the circumstances concerning the marriage of your fiancé. If he was married in the Catholic Church, he will need an annulment before going forward on his church wedding to you. If he was not married in the Church, he will need a Lack of Form dispensation which is much simpler. Please talk to your parish priest about this. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: What will happen to us who want to believe,
but cannot? – Don _______________________ Don: If you want to believe, you must pray and ask God to touch your heart. Take the first step and start attending Church. Read the bible. Continue to pray constantly. I believe you are searching, so I would suggest you talk this out with a priest or minister. You have eternal life to gain. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: Kareemo: Congratulations on your planned marriage in the Philippines next year. Since you are both married by civil law and are living together, you cannot receive communion until your marriage is solemnized in the Church. - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ____________________ Charlie: The Church has recognized that any visions of the Blessed Virgin Mary are in the realm of “private revelations.” So, in other words, such visions can be accepted or not accepted by a believer unless otherwise warned by the Congregation of the Doctrine of the Faith (Vatican City). But according to the many mystics that have lived in the past, “saints” have visited others on earth. One saint that comes to mind is Padre Pio. He has been known to appear to those in grave illness. Nonetheless, any visions such as the saints or Jesus Himself are in the realm of private revelation. They are not necessary for salvation. My faith in Jesus Christ is all that is required for salvation. - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: _____________________________ Gregory: Your parents were misinformed. You were given Extreme Unction (The Anointing of The Sick) as a baby because you were possibly dying. This hasn’t been true for some time now. You are entitled to the sacraments of the Church the same as your siblings. But first, you must talk to your parish priest and set the records straight. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: __________________________ Mike: I am happy to hear that you have served the Lord in these ministries. Now, it is time to come back to your “spiritual home.” The process is simple. Please talk to your parish priest about your situation and the process in being accepted into full communion with the Catholic Church. I am excited to hear that you will be once again a full-member of the Catholic Church. I hope and pray that you will use your ministerial gifts for the Church! - CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ______________________________ Matthew: Since there was no expectation from you legally concerning your overseas journey, there is nothing to stop you from resigning your position with that company to join another. Hopefully in the future, you will be more honest in all your dealings with employers. After twenty years, there isn’t much you can do and the company did not ask from you any restitution for the overseas seminar. Be at peace. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: Jozef: I am so happy that you are returning to the Catholic Church. In order to do this, you must go and talk to your parish priest. Since you have had the Sacraments of baptism, confirmation, and first communion, you will need to be re-affirmed as a member in full standing in the Church. Talk to your parish priest who will determine what has to be done. You will also be asked to go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation (confession). Welcome back. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: __________________________ Dear Ann: You do not say if your friend's divorce is final or not. Until this man gets an annulment, he is still considered married in the eyes of the Church.if he is Catholic. You also do not say whether or not you are married, never married or divorced. It is no sin in talking, providing both of you are free to meet. There is nothing wrong if two unattached people decide to talk and not indulge in a sexual way. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: ________________________ Dear Russ: Do not distress yourself about this. God reads the heart. You are not held responsible for dreams. A dream is not an action. It is conscious actions that we worry about. If you will feel better, pray and ask God for forgiveness. He is all loving and He knows you well. Continue to move on, serving the Lord. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: I was married to my first husband outside the church in a civil ceremony. We have been divorced for the past 2 years. I've recently become engaged to another Catholic and we wish to marry in the Church. Do I need an annulment? Thanks, LC ____________________ LC: Yes, you can marry in the Church. You will need a Lack of Form dispensation that can be had from your local parish priest. Congratulations on your upcoming marriage! – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: __________________ Maribeth: Good question! Some believe it is because our relatives in heaven are not limited by time and can see the blessings ahead or the final outcome of earthly situations. Someday we will have the answer to that. Right now, we have to rely on God’s wisdom and judgment to make all things right. We are limited here by our humanity; relatives in heaven are not. – CatholicView Staff CatholicView Staff: ___________________________ Dear Jackie: Of course you can attend your grandchild’s
baptism. But, you will have to refrain from
accepting communion. For Catholics, the Vatican counts as valid
only Catholic Eucharist--bread and wine that have been consecrated by a priest as part of
a Catholic Mass. For more
information, check with your parish priest. –
CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: _____________________ Dear Jane: Congratulations and thank you for your question. A Catholic and non-Catholic can have their marriage blessed in the Catholic Church. Your husband does not have to become Catholic in order to do so. See your priest for more information on this. God bless you. – CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: ____________________ Dear Sheila: I am so sorry that your father cannot see the pain he is causing you and your family. Why does your mother allow this to happen? And have you talked to her about this? The bible tells us to honor our fathers and our
mothers in the Ten Commandments. In your case it is difficult to do this. But you did the right thing and God is very
pleased and will bless you greatly for adhering to God’s commandment. You say
that your dad has been ill. Is it a serious
illness? Is he incapable of taking care of himself? Sometimes when people are
ill, it makes them feel powerful to tear others down.
If you can, ignore his atrocious behavior and try to avoid spending extra
time that may cause you grief. If he truly
needs you, ignore his awful behavior and try to help him for he will always be your
father. Even now you are being blessed for
the respect you have given him, even though he might not deserve it. Hope this helps.
– CatholicView Staff
CatholicView Staff: ___________________ Richard: I am sorry that you indulge in pornography. I thank God that your conscience is telling you to avoid this sin. Having evil thoughts can lead you into action. I would advise that when you are inclined to do this that you replace these evil desires with a simple prayer asking God to strengthen and keep you from sin. The repetition of prayer makes you stronger because you, through prayer, are calling on the highest power available to man; Almighty God. You will overcome this addiction if you continue to pray. Pray a simple prayer such as: “Lord, I love you. Keep me from all unclean thoughts Please go and see your priest. He will help you to understand what God expects from all of us. Remember God loves you and wants you to have peace in your life - CatholicView Staff
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